"Will litter your house with beer cans and butts, use foul language and show you my tattoos for meth." cont'd on back "Except I don't know how to write any of that. So just give me the meth."
Oh my, do I ever feel stupid. For I thought the key to winning this award was quality--not quantity (as in who wowed the judge(s) with the most clever caption as opposed to who overwhelmed him(them) with the most entries). No, this is not meant to be another caption submission, but if it's a winner, this is my entry and I'm sticking with it!
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Free to a good home!
ReplyDeleteWay down yonder on the Chattahooche. Nothing's hotter than my hoochie coochie!
ReplyDeleteMight as well share, might as well smile, I need more Smokes in my little bitty life.
ReplyDeleteor
Will sing for little bitty smokes!
or
Attention Alan Jackson! Baby, I got your little bitty right here!
That's right baby - all this and no teeth. Come get me boys!
ReplyDeleteWill arm wrestle for cigarettes
ReplyDeleteI know what you're thinking ... F-you I'm a lady!
ReplyDeleteSuthern grls rokc!
ReplyDeleteThat's right boys, I got your Chattahoochie right here!
ReplyDeleteALAN JACKSON, PLEASE BE MY BABY DADDY!
ReplyDelete'Unisex' leads to this!
ReplyDelete"UNION"
ReplyDeleteOh wait, that was Sally Field.
Try this one:
"Will litter your house with beer cans and butts, use foul language and show you my tattoos for meth." cont'd on back "Except I don't know how to write any of that. So just give me the meth."
"Guess my sex for $1"
ReplyDelete50% tobacco.
ReplyDelete50% white trash.
110% bovine.
Sarah Palin in 2012!
ReplyDelete"I'm carrying his baby, will dance for food."
ReplyDeleteThis is your brain on Crack.
ReplyDeleteUh,that's my mother.
ReplyDeleteI asked for the three wolf t-shirt and all i got was this lousy alan jackson.
ReplyDeleteHoley crap, i missed my award!
ReplyDeleteSorry.
I got it now!
Teaches me for missing a few crotchety old posts.
Y'all been saved?
ReplyDelete"I'm single, come and get me!"
ReplyDeleteI'm Alan Jackson's brother!
ReplyDeleteNo, I'm not Michael Chiklis -stop asking!
ReplyDeleteYikes. That scared me.
ReplyDeleteHave a terrific day Crotchety. :)
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady.
ReplyDeleteI HAVE come a long way, baby!!!
ReplyDelete"Available."
ReplyDeletehelp me finish my sex change surgery
ReplyDeleteplease donate generously
god bless
for $1 i wont follow you to your wife/girlfriend/moms house and pretend we are more than just friends
ReplyDeletegod bless
I'm a pc
ReplyDeleteIt's 5:00 right here, right now
ReplyDeleteCome rock this jukebox baby
ReplyDeleteWelcome to Hickory County, James Dobson
ReplyDeleteWill work for heavy-duty armpit hair razor.
ReplyDeleteThis is Sparta!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am a product of the Pro Life movement!
ReplyDeleteScratch and Sniff - 10 cents!
ReplyDeleteTrading smokes for a strong deodorant (preferably unused).
ReplyDeleteHigh Mileage
ReplyDelete(AJ 1998 album)
It Must Be Love
ReplyDeleteRemember When
ReplyDeleteBetween the Devil and Me
ReplyDeleteWill put on more clothes for money.
ReplyDeleteGum jobs - $5.
ReplyDeleteCome and get me before my junk hits its expiration date. It’s not June, 2004 yet, is it?
ReplyDeleteWill pose as a skinny girl’s “before” picture.
ReplyDeleteAnd Billy-Bob's tractor pull run gets a 9.0 from the Hog Holler judge. One point was deducted for running over brother Bobby-Bob.
ReplyDeleteUrine needed for drug test. $5 a pint.
ReplyDeleteJohn 3:16
ReplyDeleteSee Mama! I told you I'd make parole!
ReplyDeleteRESPECT ME FOR MY BRIANS
ReplyDeleteOh my, do I ever feel stupid. For I thought the key to winning this award was quality--not quantity (as in who wowed the judge(s) with the most clever caption as opposed to who overwhelmed him(them) with the most entries). No, this is not meant to be another caption submission, but if it's a winner, this is my entry and I'm sticking with it!
ReplyDeleteIs that Ally Kristie ?
ReplyDelete$ 5.00 sucky sucky !!
ReplyDeleteOK - OK - I'll hang the curtains !
ReplyDeleteI suck dick for cash, or smokes
ReplyDeleteRemember Madonna? It's me Madonna, hey look it's me, Madonna.
ReplyDeleteMe love you long time for beer and wrestling tickets
ReplyDeleteAlan! I WILL be your surrogate baby mama!
ReplyDelete"How do you like my new boob job? -- signed Thinkinfyou"
ReplyDeletei WENT TO A BLACKBOARD CONVENTION AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY SHIRT
ReplyDeleteAlan, cleaned dead rats out of trailer. Come Home
ReplyDelete