My memory sucks

Since the stroke my memory is horrible. I mean I had a kickass blog post for you today. I can't remember a the title. My buddy in here has memory problems, too and it's hilarious.

He'll ask a ques.tion of me, Ill forget what he asked, then he'll forget what he asked.

Our conversations will last 2 hours, cover a myriad of subjects, and by the end won't remember a damned thing.

Don't forget the porky contest. A couple guesses came realy close.



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A Porky Contest

First of all a happy St Patrick's Day to youse.

I'm having a contest, sadly only one winner.

The prize is genuine NJ pork roll. Yum.

Earliest correct guess wins. One guess per person, per day.

Ok, here goes.

Regular readers have a huge advantage in this.

I'm missing a few body parts.

Some teeth, some toes.

But last year during this journey into hell, doctors took one more thing. It's nothing internal. What was it?

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How to have fun while while at the rehab center

Sure are a lot of hours to fill.

Monday, Wednesday, and Friday I spend about 5 hours at dialysis then about 30 minutes in PT.

Tuesday, Thursday I spend about 2 hours. Weekends about each day in PT about an hour.

That leaves (multiply by 7, add 23, subtract 14, divide by pi, add the negatve square root of 123) 39,534 hours, more or less, for mischief.

Because mobility is limited, so is mischief.

I have a grabber, which doubles as a nurse hiney pincher. Any nurse within about 6 feet of my bed is fair game.

Next I have my wheelchair, ideal for racing and cruising the halls for hiney pinching on the go.

OOOOOOOOOHHH There goes a new nurse. Maybe she'll want to look at my naughty bits.

Got to go. See youse soon.

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Greetings and felicitations

I finally got online and I'm not busy throwing up so I guess it's time for a blog post. Me and the Mrs. are hanging in. My buddy down the hall is an engineer so he got me online, and will write the directions so I can do it every day.


So far, I sent two physical therapists running from the room crying. (skinny little beotches-heh heh)

Probably explains why I have a psychologist assigned to me. Can youse say anger issues?

I'm healing from the last 10 months of hell and getting stronger every day. Can't stand yet, but I'm working towards it. Got some machine where they slip like a heavy duty bra under my ass and lift me up.

Thanks everyone for staying with me. Your phone calls and messages have been a Godsend.

A special thanks to MA Fat Woman.

And Janna, why don't you call and we can discuss a pork roll contest?

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FROM JFK TO SUB-ACUTE

Last night Crochety was sent to a new sub-acute facility. I asked that he come home, but the hospital felt he was "too fragile". They seem to think that he is just too weak now, which is exactly what he projects. He did get excited this morning when I spoke with him and told him I bought a new 40" TV so maybe that will be incentive enough for him to work out more and get his strength up! Lord knows I have tried EVERYTHING else...

His new place is AristaCare @ Norwood Terrace in North Plainfield. Room number is 222B and his phone is 908-222-5140.

Here we go again!


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We Thought Calcium Was a Good Thing.

Crochety was due to go to rehab yesterday but the hospital is confused about where he is going. Crazy right?

Then his blood calcium level shoots up and the endocrinologist says he isn't going anywhere, except a new room!

He is in 2549 and the phone number is 732-321-7125.

We are hanging in there...Thanks everyone,

Mrs. "C"

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Room 4307. Haven't we been here before?

Crochety is still in the hospital but they moved him back to the Telemetry floor and now he is back on a heart monitor. We don't know why yet. Maybe just a precaution. All he is lamenting is how he is being pried away from the prettiest nurses.

He has been nauseous and dry heaving for the past 2 days, for which he is getting shots to calm his stomach. His para-thyroid gland is acting up and producing too much calcium. It is like a vicious cycle, no? All the doctors agree that if he pushed himself to move more and get the circulation pumping he would be on the road to recovery...

His new phone is 732-321-7383.

We are wishing you a great Superbowl day! Maybe he needs a couple of beers to set him up right. I will be snacking and cheering next to his hospital bed...oh goody...

Crochety is still going with the Colts, but I am sure it will be the SAINTS!


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