Tuesday, August 11, 2009

My new shirt

I got up at 4:30 a.m., as usual. I got dressed in the dark, and something didn't feel quite right. The shirt felt like it was inside out.

But no, it buttoned ok, so that wasn't it.

So I went into the hallway and waited for the transport guys. They loaded me up and into the ambulance we went.

Zipping along in the early morning, by the interior lights, it hit me-- I had on a puffy shirt.

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There were ruffles and busy scrolls everywhere!

Apparently the Crotchety Old Lady is playing some perverse joke on me.

The nurses here are terrible. I've been waiting 40 minutes for pain medication. And this morning the nurse came in at 4 a.m. to ask me if I wanted to be awakened at my usual time of 4:30 a.m.

Can't make this crazy stuff up.

And thank you my favorite goat, Pricilla, who sent a nice get well card and a small gift. I appreciate it.




http://www.humorbloggers.com/

37 comments:

Collette said...

Now you just need a pirate hat (I think a bedpan will do nicely) & a peg leg (I'm sure that's not far off their list with all they have been doing to you). ARGH!

LL said...

Did you ask the nurse for her home phone number so you could call her in the afternoon and tell her your preferred wake up time?

Adullamite said...

Your wife is getting her own back! Time to show your authority I think!

FishHawk said...

Hey, maybe that wasn't actually a puffy shirt, but just one of your old ones? For after losing well over a hundred pounds, there would be a lot excess material hanging around.

On second thought, the puffy shirt does make for a much more interesting mental picture--especially if you follow Collette's advice and use a bedpan as your pirate hat. So, I would stick with that, matey.

Lauren said...

Well no puffy shirt or special card but you're in my thoughts.

nonamedufus said...

Hey DOM, you know who makes puffy pirate shirts? AHHRRRRROW!

And if some wise ass asks you "Hey, where's your buccaneers?" Just tell 'em, "Under my buccan hat!"

Take care, matey.

The Peach Tart said...

Puffy shirt - I think you were just traveling to your appointment in style.

Don said...

Gotta tell ya Joe, the funniest part of that post is the nurse coming it at 4 asking if you wanted to be wakened at 4:30. That's priceless! Now that a Seinfeld episode.

ReformingGeek said...

Oh, good. You got my gift. I'm sorry it didn't seem to fit you too well. ;-)

Secondary Roads said...

How about a pair of black garters to on the arms of that pouffy shirt.

Quirkyloon said...

And when do we get a picture of you in your new adorable puffy shirt?

Heh heh heh

And a big *kapow* to those senseless nurses and their stupid questions!

Yeesh!

Sandee said...

I remember that puffy shirt. It's downright ugly. You need to talk to Mrs. Crotchety about this. I've a feeling it's one of the nurses though.

Have a terrific day. :)

moooooog35 said...

You should have spent the rest of the day just going:

"Argh."

Stacie's Madness said...

puffy shirts are hot.

ok, not really but I'm sure you rocked it out regardless.

Pricilla said...

I'll bet you were stylin' in that puffy shirt!

I am glad my little package arrived safely.

Lin said...

Are you going home yet, Joe?? Were you all dressed up in your frilly blouse to go home?! Imagine what the neighbors will say. ;)

shyne said...

OK.....I'm feeling quite perverse laughing at your not so fun experiences.
But, damn, COM....you're funny!

Can't wait for this all to come to an end and you're back home, enjoying those NJ tomatoes and complaining abot the Jersey wildlife.

Be better soon.....PLEASE!

Janna said...

Nurse: (*waking you up at 4*) "Would you like me to wake you up at 4:30?"

You: "No! Dammit, I wanted to get up at 3:15, and thanks to you I'm 45 minutes LATE now!"

David said...

I like having a little while to really wake up while I wiggle my toes in the sheet so the 4 am alert for the 4:30 wake up would suit me perfectly.

Cheers

vanilla said...

A small recognition for your work on my blog.

Jenn Thorson said...

New Jersey could use more pirates, to spruce things up a bit. Perhaps you could set a trend.

I'm sorry about the strange customer service by Nursedom currently. Here's hoping you get some rest.

Sherry at EX Marks the Spot said...

Why don't you post a picture of YOU in your own puffy shirt?!!?!

Lady Sarcasm said...

Arg matey! them puffy shirts are so last year! ;)

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

What kind of evil thoughts are running through a nurse's mind when she (he?) wakes you up to ask you if you want to be awakened 30 minutes later?

Do you want me to come over and punch her? Cuz I'll do it!

ettarose said...

DOM, I don't know why stars go to the hospital for rest. It is the most un-restful place in the world. Hurry and get home!

RE - BadGalSays said...

So are you pretending to be Prince today dom ? I want to see the boots and skintight pants. if you whip out a guitar and start working it out, I promise I am going to be the first in line for your cd; and any subsequent shows whether I have to use my Davita Gold card or not. you know we got them connections ;)

work it out Joe - remember "you are driving that Red Cadillac".

for those who don't know that's dialysis lingo for saying you run the machine; it does't run you.

miss. chief said...

BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE A PIRATE!

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