Sunday, November 30, 2008

Ketchup time

The illness that I mentioned is CHF (congestive heart failure.) You know those lists when you go to a new doctor or health plan, and you need to list all past diseases, conditions, and illnesses, yeah, I pretty well check off everything but vaginal dryness.

The CHF isn't hard to deal with usually, and as long as I take my meds and do all the stuff I'm supposed to, all is well. I didn't do either. So, basically, fluids built up, and I'm drowning in my own juices. Yeah, I'm a moron. I've been reminded of it hourly by my family.

Photobucket
Breathing. It's a good thing

I'm still marooned here because I can't go up steps. I'm having a ramp built Monday morning, so I'll be able to crawl back into my hovel.

And I'll be able to play online without the nephew staring at me because World of Warcraft is without his whatever the heck it is he has, right now. I'm going out on a limb here, and presuming it is some sort of important warcraft.

Lastly, because I obsess about weird things, I have prepared a post to be put up in case I croak. It is a tear filled tribute to me. It is wrought with emotion and stuff. I'm hoping you don't get to read it soon, but it is there just in case.

I care about youse in perpetuity.

www.humorbloggers.com

31 comments:

tahtimbo said...

Please, take your medications!! I love reading your posts, but I DO NOT want to read your tribute. I will be keeping you daily in my prayers. It is my way of saying that I care about you.

This Brazen Teacher said...

Perhaps you need a behavior modification plan. Shall I draw one up for you? Seriously, this is your health- and my entertainment on the line.

Laura-Junkfoodaholic.com said...

I sure hate to hear you're having a hard time health-wise. I hope you get better soon and I sure hope we won't be reading your tribute post any time soon. Hang in there!

Heather said...

There is definitely no croaking allowed. I already had everything crossed for you, so now i'll get the stick figure children to cross theirs. Take care and just so you know your posts light up my day.

Adullamite said...

Time that woman of yours gave you a good slap!

Kathy said...

Hey, I just got here relatively recently. You do not have my permission to do anything but keep posting. I'm letting you slide on the pictures thing. Scanned doodles are OK for now. A tribute is certainly not. Now feel better already!

Lauren said...

No croaking allowed! It's TIME to see the step DAUGHTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Time to check our ego!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Feel better soon.

eve cleveland said...

Joe.....
We've been over this! You cannot leave me here alone with myself. My life is empty without you to irritate.
Heart you!
Eve

ReformingGeek said...

Uh.....please hang in there. I just added you to my reading list and gosh-darn-it I don't want to have to re-organize my reading list again!

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Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

Would a {{{hug}}} help? I'm good at huggin'...but only if you promise to take yer meds...and keep on postin'! The bloggysphere will be a very dull place with ya. Sending uplifting thoughts your way Joe!
.........and {{{hugs}}}

Krissi said...

OMG! So you have already eulogized yourself, exactly how did that work for ya? I cannot imagine having that as a back up blog "just incase" but I'm with you in hoping that we (your loyal and royal army) don't get the chance to see what you've to say any time soon!!

Hope you are back to your Crotchety old self soon!!

~*~Shadow.Crystal~*~ said...

You take care of yourself, Old Man! I'm pretty sure none of us want to be reading that tribute post for, oh, another 80 or 90 years ;-)
I'm not sure how much this sort of thing means to you, but you are most definitely in my prayers. Hope you feel better soon!

LadyBanana said...

This is not good, you gotta take your meds and get yourself better..

as others have said we don't want to be reading any tributes!

OK!!

Carol said...

A drafted post to go up in the event of my death seems like a good idea. Even though I don't have CHF.

Take your meds, man.

GumbyTheCat said...

I'm with tahtimbo. I never want to read your tribute post. I want you here for a long long time. You're one of the first bloggers I ever "met" and although we've never met and never will, I sense the person behind the blog. And I like that person. Take care of yourself dammit!

MA Fat Woman said...

I got diagnosed with CHF this past spring...turned out to be gas. Laughing gas, that is. It seems before I started MA Fat Woman I wasn't laughing enough and the Dr. ordered me to start laughing a little more. I staggered onto your blog somehow and haven't stopped laughing since. I'm all better now, thanks to you.

Don said...

Hey Joe
Damn man! Take the stinkin' pills. It's better NOT to have to gasp...Look forward to you getting back to your old normal self. Well, maybe not so old.

Deb said...

I thought CHF meant Crotchety Hot Farts. No?

Take the pills. It's not like it's blood letting with leeches. Maybe Mrs. Crotchety needs to hide the pills in some cheese or something.

Feel better soon!

Chat Blanc said...

Crotchety! you are not allowed to leave the classroom of life. you do not yet have the proper heaven hallway pass. you are hereby required to take all necessary meds AND post 1-2 times a daily as needed. :D I lurves you!

Bee said...

Well holy crap dude! :o(
Don't make us send Don over there and force feed you stuff!

Lipstick said...

Alright Crotchety...your friendly neighborhood pharmacist Lipstick here. Take your damn pills. I will be highly pissed and will experience prolonged grief if I see your tribute post.

You did make me laugh about the vaginal dryness though.
Cyberhugs to you.

The Hawg! said...

Get well, Crotchety. Take your meds, you pinhead!

Swirl Girl said...

Now be a good boy and make all gone, now!

Nicole said...

This has been a long 4 days without you being home for me to call every couple of minutes and annoy you!! I miss you lots!! Can't wait till your home tomorrow!!

ettarose said...

You have no damn business writing a eulogy. None what so ever. What, are you stupid? You take your damned medicine. Do NOT make all of us gang up on you and give you your meds anally, cuz we will you know. Well, Don will anyways. Besides, I have been meaning to tell you, the frickin post office ate my Dove chocolate. I never got it. Now you have a reason to take your pills.

FishHawk said...

Old Crotchetys never croak. They just become statues for pigeons to poop on in city parks.

P.S.: I hear Castor Oil is a good treatment for what ails you.

CastoCreations said...

Oh NO! I just found you ... you can't be kicking it yet.

Take care of yourself please. :)

Kirsten said...

Take care of yourself, old man!

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