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I'm not sure how this is determined, and it really doesn't matter.
As of Wednesday, it officially became a Depression. The Crotchety Old Lady was laid off.
So, now I'm concerned. I need to find her a job. Quickly.
I spend my day doing important things, and she gets in the way, wanting do stuff like talk, and
Now, TV is one of my favorite things, but I watch important things like Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Step by Step, Comedy Central, Food Network, ESPN, YES (Yankee games), and Spongebob. She watches stupid stuff like soaps and movies.
My routine is pretty much set, and with Twitter, and blogging, and TV watching, there is no time for stuff like entertaining her. So, apparently, I'll have to take time out of my busy day to find employment for her.
Let's see, she is really good at shoveling snow, but that tends to be seasonal, and it will be at least 6 months or more until we get any more of that cold white here fluff here.
Pirates are in the news, so maybe she could get a job as a pirate
Rocking it as a plus size pirate
She could pull off the look, but on a ship, she insists on drinks being brought to her, and having access to a buffet every 4 hours. I don't think most pirate ships are staffed like the Pacific Princess.
Lots of older Americans are finding second careers and they work at Wal Mart
We do have one right down the street from us, so that is a possibility.
I did think about sending her to MickeyD's for a job, unfortunately, she only speaks English
Que?
Any other suggestions would be welcome. She has a lot of good qualities. She's good at shoveling snow, yard work, and cooking my dinner. I could teach her about blogging so both of us can not make money by blogging.
Forget that. I need to encourage her to get out and find a job before she drives me crazy. It's already been 2 loooooong days.
http://www.humorbloggers.com/
21 comments:
Did she pay her taxes? If not, she could get a job in Obama's cabinet.
Has she taken any kickbacks? If so, she could become one of Obama's innumerable "czars".
Otherwise? Well, I don't know what else to suggest.
I'm very sorry to hear that. I hope she can find a job soon. I tried at Walmart and they said they weren't hiring. How depressing is that? Here I have a college degree and I can't even get a job at Walmart? Oh well, maybe I can get one at AIG, I hear they have a great incentive plan:)
I am so sorry, Crotchety!!!
Well, you know, she could always be a PB&J chef...
Sorry to hear her distress.
However surely she will be too busy job seeking to bother you? That's a full time job in itself.
Oh no!! Shit! I am so sorry. Is she ok? I have been laid off twice in three years and I was devastated. Hopefully, Mrs. C. is more emotionally healthy than I am. lol
Joe, I do career counseling and would be happy to help. I have been doing resume revision for people who are out of work at no charge.
If that could be helpful, e-mail me.
{hug} Hang in there friend. :)
I'd be happy to give her the scoop about my many jobs if you're interested. Just shoot me a line.
I'm sorry to hear about that. Maybe she could be an exotic dancer?
2 days? Wow. Best of luck. Maybe that won't be too tough for her, but... It's always the damn "buts" that get you. The Wal*Mart thing is good. She good get deals on your food and snow shovels for next season.
I need someone to mow my lawn so I can spend more time blogging.
I thought that pirate idea was awesome, though.
Get her some good running shoes and have her start training for a marathon. Sign her up for one that is in Hawaii!
Sorry to hear your misfortune.
Mildly related: I wish Step by Step still came on around here. Patrick Duffy is highly underrated as a sitcom dad.
I have offered to become an exotic dancer myself, and I believe that I would be quite successful at it. For what could be more exotic than 400 pounds of goo just a jigglin' it up there on stage?
My wife wants to keep it all to herself, however, but maybe you are more patriotic than her. After all, we all need to do our part to get the economy going gangbusters again.
@ SpeakDog: She is one who believes in following the rules, so she has no chance at a high profile government job.
@ Tahtimbo: It's unbelievable today. Good luck in your job search.
@ Lipstick: Thanks. Lately she has been making some really good grilled cheese, too.
@ Adullamite: I guess she's busy "gearing up" because she hasn't left the lounge chair.
@ Marie: She knew it was coming. Thank you so much for the offer. I'll e-mail you if she wants the help. She is thinking about a lot of different things right now.
@ MA: Thanks. I'll send you an email after talking to her.
@ Dizz: While I think she'd be great at it, I doubt most other men would share my enthusiasm.
@ Don: I know, win-win.
@ Reforming: She could probably do that, but the cummute would be tough on her.
@ Shawn: It's on Family Channel on weekday mornings. Not exactly prime time.
@ FishHawk: You wife doesn't want to share you with the world of sleaze? Pretty selfish of her.
Terrible news, but not very uncommmon in these parts. Only suggestion I have is come to NY, get a government job-- BIG money, perks, free full health care, free car, (3) 2-week paid vacations, security from speed traps, pension... after all, people wanted the Gubment to "create jobs," so how else are they going to do it?
...and there's also jobs in the world's oldest profession, which is seeing a big boom these days...
oh get your mind out of the gutter-- that's GARDENING I'm talking about!
Hope you all fare well.
I know many couples are finding their roles reversed and young fathers are staying home with babies as young wives go off to work. Maybe, seeing as how, your wife has been working and you staying home, the two of you could reverse roles and you could find a job and let her stay home? Just a thought.
I am sorry about your wife's job. The publicist can commiserate. She goes a little nutso when the male person is home. He works three days a week and then is home the other four. He totally messes with her schedule...
I hope things work out.
@ Crabby Blogging Lady: She doesn't want to cross the river. Maybe she can find something here in the Garden State.
@ Patricia: Me go to work? That's crazy talk. I'm a kept man.
@ Pricilla: Thanks. Things will be ok, just need to find things to occupy her.
So sorry to hear about your wife's job loss.
Hmmmm....
Ok, let's think about this.
She's good at cooking your dinner, you say?
Then you could start paying her for each dinner. Be sure and leave a tip as well.
Then you could retroactively pay her for all the yard work and snow shoveling... or she could invoice you. No doubt there will be added interest and late fees.
She'll be rich in no time!
@ Thinking: Thanks.
@ Janna: We have a system here that has been working well. I encourage her to do the yard work, and to shovel the snow, and she does it. She makes dinner, I eat it. She washes clothes, I dirty them. We are all about harmony and balance, and she likes that, I think.
She enjoys that.
Maybe she could Twitter for you, kind of like Ellen DeGeneres does? Then you could spend more time blogging and drinking coffee, etc?
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