Friday, May 01, 2009

Caption winner announced; Swine flu update

The staff at Crotchety Old Man World Wide Headquarters and Discount House of Worship spent most of the week hiding under their desks from the Swine Flu (scientific health code number 867-5309.) They were finally convinced to come out and vote after HQ was thoroughly wiped down with Pine-Sol and Diet Dr. Pepper.

Anyway, we received nearly 50 captions, so the work was tough for them.

Lots of great captions received attention. Moooooog, Secondary Roads, My Daily List, WaltSense, Quirky, Lauren, FishHawk, Nooter, Swirl Girl, Tahtimbo, Philip Dyer, and Jessie.

Photobucket
Garden gnomes sure do come in a wide variety these days.

And the winner and the Zucchini goes to Douglas Dyer

Second place is Winky Twinky, and third was FishHawk.
Photobucket
Thanks to everyone for participating.

And as for the Swine Flu update, last I checked, it has reached the point where I don't want anyone breathing around my blog. Please read quickly and hold your breath while doing so. I'll be bleaching the website every 4 hours until further notice. Don't touch the screen, and don't ask for a bite of my sandwich. And no, I can't give you a ride to the doctor's office.

Sorry. I hope you understand, but the flu threat level has been raised from "Pretty darn serious" to "Holy crap, we are all going to die."

Help yourself to a Kleenex and get the heck out of here. Photobucket

If we live through the night, I'll see youse tomorrow with more flu updates.

http://www.humorbloggers.com/

97 comments:

Kirsten said...

Sorry, I sneezed on the your blog! It's okay, I'm sure it's just the regular flu, but I'll let you know if I just infected the first New Jerseyan.

The Queen said...

Is this where the name swine flu came from... is that the swine that gave us all the flu....

cough cough sneeze sneeze.... oops sorry.. I forgot to cover my mouth.. use strong bleach... I"m off to spread the flu to other blogs..

I'm sorry.. I got nothing for this picture.. it's just tooooo gross for me..and that..my dear man.. is saying a lot..

Winky Twinky said...

WOW....I can't tell you how honored I am to rank second place (bowing)... bad news is...yes, I've been sick...and yes, I accidentally sneezed on your blog.. damn, sorry DOM

Janna said...

Wow, the air is thick with germs and swine-like particles and bacteria as large as confetti.

Maybe I shouldn't have sat my bare butt on your kitchen table.

Marie said...

Congrats to the winner.

I sat this one out because some of the pictures make me too sad to be funny.

What a sap I am.

Lauren said...

Congrats to the winner. Thanks for the mention. :) BTW the flu outbreak is a hop skip and jump from me right now. The pollen is so bad and it's raining and I'm coughing and that's a disaster in the making.

Shawn said...

Congrats to Douglas...the Dyer Boys are pretty much near professional level when it comes to captioning photos.

ReformingGeek said...

Fort Worth schools are closed and they canceled Mayfest (large spring celebration in Fort Worth). We're doomed. ;-)

Congrats to the winner!

Joanie M said...

Back in the mid-70's when swine flu was scaring the crap out of everyone, my father FORCED me to get the swine flu vaccine. Yes, I said forced... I was 21 and caved to my dad's influence. Anywho, I got the shot. Now I discover the damned thing won't help me because this is a different strain! Thanks, Dad.

DouglasDyer said...

Thanks very much! I'm typically wary of strange men handing me zucchini but I will make a very proud exception this time.

Jenn Thorson said...

Next we will be seeing Crotchety reporting to us from his plastic bubble. :)

Sandee said...

Congratulations to Douglas. Very well deserved.

I just sneezed all over your blog. Sorry.

Have a terrific weekend Crotchety. :)

FishHawk said...

Whoa, evidently there really is something to huffing Pine Sol and snorting Diet Dr. Pepper after all. Third place??? YAHOO!!! I would like to thank the judges for finally changing to submission rules to allow tasteful captions from the likes of me, me and me to count.

Oh yeah, congrats to David. Reluctantly, I must admit that your caption was indeed funny.

On a more serious note, I hope you are feeling better, my dear Crotchety. If you aren't, maybe a call to the Yankees might be helpful. For one of A-Rod's peeps could probably hook you up.

Stacie's Madness said...

ugh I am still traumatized by the picture.

Da Old Man said...

@ Kirsten: We've been swine flu free so far, but being so close to New York, I'm sure it will hit here soon enough.

@ The Queen: I'm going straight Clorox every 2 hours as the threat has gone up.

@ Winky: I'm wearing a HazMat suit, so it's ok.

@ Janna: That's ok, I'll just chop up the table and use it for firewood.

@ Marie: It's all good.

@ Lauren: I know.

@ Shawn: I noticed. They are good.

@ Reforming: This is the beginning of the end.

@ Joanie: I remember we all were going to die from that, too.

@ Douglas: It's all good.

@ Jenn: I'm more a HazMat suit kind of guy.

@ Sandee: No problem. I'm suited up and armed with 2 bottles of bleach.

@ FishHawk: I'm thinking of contacting Roger Clemens.

@ Stacie: Sorry.

Pricilla said...

I left a goat gas aura all over you blog. That should kill everything for quite a while.

I hope you feel better.

Don said...

And remember to never lick your keyboard! It's a sure way to catch the flu or convince your wife you're nutz like she says.

Expat From Hell said...

I think there should be an award for the best treatment of the latest pandemic - Swine Flu. Great post, I will be back again.

ExpatFromHell

Swirl Girl said...

I have found you can type faster wearing duct tape on your fingers...try it!

Da Old Man said...

@ Don: I won't lick my keyboard or my wife.

@ Expat: Thanks. Glad to see you, and hope to see you again

@ Swirl: I will

Lin said...

What makes this whole Flu thing so crazy is that they keep changing the name of it now! Oh, I lysoled my fingers before commenting.

Winky Twinky said...

Way to go Douglas!!! You did it again -- BAM!! Hey, when you got it, you got it.... :-P

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Glad you don't have the flu, which would just suck since you're still so injured from the trip the other day (that is, the trip on the threshold, not like a vacation trip).

I didn't sneeze or cough on your blog. Didn't even wipe my nose. But I wiped my butt and didn't wash my hands. Sorry...is that bad?

Da Old Man said...

@ Lin: They can't decide what it is. I wish they would make up their minds so I know what I'm dying from.

@ Winky: He got it. Is it catching?

@ Mary: Yes, it would.

Phillipia said...

Can I get one suit in each color?
I have enough bubble wrap to play...to protect me til the suits arrive.

Congrats to Winky Twinky, Doug, and FishHawk on being able to stomach that picture long enough to come up with a winning caption:)

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