Wednesday, September 10, 2008

"High Falutin' Ultra Classy Caption This"

Because some of the recent "caption thises" (caption these?) were so...well, let's just say they would have surely killed Granny Crotchety if she weren't already dead.

So, this week, I've classed up the contest with a famous painting from some guy named Dave. I saw this painting live and in person on one of my many trips to the Met in New York, and I immediately started coming up with better captions for it than "The Death of Socrates." Socrates last words had something to do with take out chicken, so you know he had to say some other really funny stuff.

(ed. note: Crotchety has only been to the Met once, but has seen the Mets many times, which is almost the same to him.)

As usual, I will dole out some craptastic prizes on Friday. Good luck, and good captioning.

Photobucket


Socrates would have lived if he knew about:
http://www.humorbloggers.com/

43 comments:

MA Fat Woman said...

Shut the hell up! Can't you see Da old man is trying to take a nap.

TheFLy said...

"The hour of departure has arrived and we go our ways; I to die, and you to live. Which is better? Only God knows. All I know is that I want some big ass titties in my face before I go."
-Socrates


Yeah, he said that, look it up.

Chica said...

One more word out of you, I'll make you marry my daughter we keep in the cellar, SILENCE!

Chat Blanc said...

The best "Pull My Finger" contest EVER!

Bradley said...

Drama in a Bath House.

dadthedude said...

and then he stuck his finger in my ass, like this....

Chris said...

"I don't mean to be a prick, before I bite the big one. But could it have killed any of you to wear some fucking shoes?"

dadthedude said...

Damn, forgot this is ultra high classy caption...

and I looked upon them and said "he, whom sits upon the foot of my bed in an act of defiance in the face of our fathers inserted his digit forth as such"

FishHawk said...

There is absolutely no way that I could add anything unto what you have already received. I think you may need to ask NASA if you could borrow one of their super-computers for a couple of days or so in order to determine a winner.

Lee said...

In 2000 years young Americans will learn how to stick their finger up like this.

Rubba said...

SOCRA!!!. . Cover the hell up and stop being such a tease . . . >:-O

Rubba said...

Smell my finger. . .

Rubba said...

NO I AM NOT LARRY SINCLAIR!
Now would you kindly remove your hand from my knee, Mr. Obama!

Rubba said...

Whether you're a brother
or whether you're a mother. . .
You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive. . .
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' aliiiive

Rubba said...

Come on, Vogue!
Let your body move to da music . . .
Hey! Hey! Hey!
Come on, Vogue!
Let your body go with da flow!

Chris Wood said...

"Fuck you! That's my cocktail ..."

~*~Shadow.Crystal~*~ said...

I've no caption this week, but dadthedude's ultra classy caption made me laugh so hard I think I peed a little. I just thought I'd share that.

ettarose said...

If he only knew he did not have to put his finger in the cup after scratching his ass.

Lauren said...

OH no he Didn'!

Dave said...

The importance of proper technique in a prostate exam is demonstrated here.

Kat said...

"...and then this jerk tells me to turn my head and cough...yeah, right..."

GumbyTheCat said...

C'mon guys. Look, don't worry about Dean Wormer's "triple-secret probation"... this is gonna be the best Delta House frat party EVER!

lot 2 learn said...

No kidding fella's, I'm here to replace the light bulb on the third floor

Jenn Thorson said...

The fraternity alumni reunion toga party went pretty much as expected-- with most of the aged frat brothers blitzed, half-naked, angry drunks, or sleeping it off.

Rubba said...

ONE OF YOU STOLE MY SANTA BUTT PLUG AND I WANT IT BACK NOW!

Kate said...

"Seriously! Get your hand off my leg!"

Sensei said...

Geez Dad! Do we have to hear the kidney stone story again?!?!?

The Hypocritical One said...

If someone doesn't fix this damn roof soon, I'll take all my clothes off. Give me that martini.

TheFLy said...

I thought I would add this since no one else mentioned it.


"TOGA! TOGA! TOGA!"

Bradley said...

I hope you have some lube handy 'cause this is your lucky day!

Adullamite said...

Sensei made me laugh!


'Die my dear doctor, that's the last thing I will do ptah!

Bill said...

He said we all have to move out - they're converting the whole damn place into condos.

Bill said...

And he shouted defiantly "Beans, Beans, the musical fruit....." and they all wept and held their heads with disbelief....

Athena said...

The servant knew Socrates should have been cut off when he started demonstrating the magnification of wheat grass enemas and what they've done for his physique.

drc8151 said...

Dead? DEAD??? What the hell do you mean I'M DEAD????

dani c said...

"Yes.....Bismuth subsalicylate shall be the ingredient that works !!!!
It shall stop the fecal matter from leaking out of all of our anus's.
I shall call it Pepto-bismol and no more nausea, heartburn,indigestion,upset stomach, DIARRHEA...."

Fish Whisperer said...

You gimme thata wine and you getta your hand offa my knee before I puta finger uppa your butt. Where da women damnit I wanna getta laid one lasta time.

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

I've come too late for the "pull my finger" or the pointing or sticking "like this" jokes.

dang. you gotta get up PRETty early in the morning at the Crotchety blog.

Deb said...

"Oh, come on guys! The wind is blowing the other way! My farts smell like roses anyway!"

shyne said...

I'll ask you just ONE more time!

WHERE ARE MY PANTS??

The Natural State Hawg said...

"Before I go, I want you all to know this. You -- everyone one of you is -- a bastard and this is all your fault."

Bradley said...

No strippers? What kind of bachelor party is this?

Anonymous said...

OK!--if you get out of my room I'll imbibe your goblet of semen.