Saturday, March 14, 2009

Have you ever been so close... fulfilling your life's mission, and just came up a little short?

I was watching TV last night Photobucket when suddenly--BAM--there it was. My search for purpose in life finally revealed itself.

And, are you ready for this, it will cost me 20 bucks to reach fulfillment. Talk about a deal and a half.

Here is the commercial that has changed my life:

I have psychotic tendencies psychic abilities and may possess the awesome mental power to find suitcases filled with cash or to predict surprise parties. Though surely with the training from this course, I'll make a fortune from the lottery alone. Do you know how happy I'd be to miss by only one number? But don't worry, I'll only use the power of my mind for good, or to bend spoons like Uri Geller.

Bend it like Beckham, erm, Geller

You'd think he would make more money straightening spoons, but I'm still new to the whole "mind power" game.

So, how about fronting me the life changing 20 bucks? I'll pay you back the very first suitcase full of money I find.


I knew you were going to say that.

Spooky, huh?


Douglas said...

I'll give you the money if you promise to keep away from my damn spoons.

Jen said...

I couldn't watch the video. I don't know why it wouldn't work but I suppose if I bought it I would.

Me-Me King said...

Well, if nothing else, you could hang the "Mystery Pendulum" in the window as a sun catcher.

Shawn said...

Predicting which suitcase has the could finally beat Deal or No Deal!

Buzzing J said...

Should adjust the antenna of your "psychic abilities" a bit. I was going to pry open my wallet for the 20 bucks after realizing the great potential of your money-making god-given gift. But then, BAM!! BAM, BAM, BAM!!! - you said "NO"!

Oh well ...

ettarose said...

I think you may need more practice. You should see that big penis coming right at you if you were to buy that video.

Michelle said...

OLD MAN you don't need help!

You are perfecto just the way you are!!

I would lend you the $20 though!!


dizzblnd said...

I have always been psychic. For instance, I don't see me dishing out $20 for something that I don't need. I hope it works well for you :)

Lauren said...

I knew you were going to post this story today!

Sherry said...

So close? Yeah, right. Aren't we all? :)

ReformingGeek said...

Please take your meds and go back to bed. Your psychotic delusions of grandeur will be gone when you wake up.

Da Old Man said...

@ Douglas: Deal!

@ Jen: I predict you'll see it a few thousand times on TV

@ Me-Me: That is worth the price of the kit by itself.

@ Shawn: Get me on the show, and we'll split the million.

@ Buzzing: I knew you were going to say that.

@ Etta: LOL

@ Michelle: I knew I could count on you. Thanks.

@ Dizz: Thanks. Lots of my readers are psychic, too.

@ Lauren: Maybe you have the ability, too. Did you pick the correct case?

@ Sherry: Always.

@ Reforming: How did you know that? Did you already buy the kit?

Rebellious Arab Girl said...

Can this video be any stupider? Who believes this crap? lool And who paid to get this video done..? :D

Relax Max said...

Is Geller out of prison already?

Charmaine said...

Ha ha ha. I sense Evil Surfer Dude is going to land on my doorstep again.

Hell, don't need to be a psychic to figure THAT out.


Janna said...

Instead of bending spoons, you could always use your powers to bend the front axles of the cars who tailgate me.
I'd really appreciate that.

nonamedufus said...

If you knew I was gonna say no, then we both just saved ourselves $20...there's $40 already! God you're good.

Da Old Man said...

@ Rebellious Arab Girl: I just know, I won't be getting one soon.

@ Relax: He bent the bars of the prison.

@ Charmaine: You just saved 20 bucks

@ Janna: I'm working on it as I type. Let me know how it works out.

@ Nonamed: I do have a gift for this.