Monday, March 23, 2009

Important New Jersey News

Just in case you were planning to visit New Jersey this summer, this is important news. The Legislature has decided to allow Brazilian waxing.

According to an AP story
The state Cosmetology and Hairstyling Board proposed banning so-called "Brazilian" bikini waxing after two women were hospitalized for infections following the procedure.

On Friday, Consumer Affairs Director David Szuchman effectively killed the plan. In a letter to the board, Szuchman says he won't support the ban, and since his office oversees the board, the ban would never be approved.


While genital waxing has never been allowed in my fine state, it has never been prohibited. In fact, no state prohibits it.

New Jersey had the chance to leap to the forefront in protecting its citizens from the scourge of naughty bits waxing.

Actually, I'm kind of glad this was not pushed through. I prefer to keep the government out of our pants.

Maybe to celebrate one of my upcoming anniversaries, I'll get something waxed.

Either that, or we'll be marketing Crotchety's Bucket O' Brazilian Home Waxing Kit. Look for it in better stores and bodegas soon.

http://www.humorbloggers.com/

34 comments:

Sherry said...

Does this surprise you? Didn't you check out my blog that has the research about how much freedom per state -- and find the your state has the least? :)
Or something like that!

dizzblnd said...

I'm all for keeping the gov't out of our pants too.

I will so buy your kit.. do your friends get discounts?

Me-Me King said...

May we, the people, decide where on your body you should wax? And, of course, we'll need documented proof. Yeow!

~*~Shadow.Crystal~*~ said...

What's scary is that the government can even propose an idea like that... it's little things like that that keep adding up and giving the government more control over society in general. (I may be a bit of a conspiracy theorist, but how can we not be these days?)

Scary thing is, now that the U.S. looks like it might begin moving in the right direction, Prime Minister Dictator up here has decided to ban some British guy from coming into the country because he speaks against the Afghanistan war. He SPEAKS... that's IT! Scary stuff.

Lauren said...

Oh thank you for this post. I now know what to get you for your birthday.

ReformingGeek said...

I hope that if you get something waxed, it's your head and not....

Oh never mind.

BBW said...

This is a big step but it is not over yet, we are haing a big petition event today at Jaira's Salon to pressure the NJ Board to finalize this and place it into the rules and regulations becuase it is technically still illegal, we were told it was illegal last month when we place a Brazilian Wax sign up so this news that they were proposing a BAN is not true, they already had it banned and they even came to the salon to inspect it last Tuesday, the 17th. Please visit our site for the petition and info for today's event.

Joanie said...

If that law had gone through, women would be sneaking over the borders into PA and NY for their waxing.
It's like the reverse when kids from PA snuck into NJ to drink when they lowered the drinking age to 18. Of course, PA lowered their drinking age, the year AFTER I turned 21. I always missed the fun stuff!

Don said...

Maybe Chelle should move to N.J. and pick up where she left off. She would probably give you a deal. Two balls for the price of one.

kalos_eidos said...

You should offer different bucket sizez...Small, Medium, Large, Silverback gorilla & Yeti.

Shawn said...

It's funny your should say that, because I always wanted to be in the government's pants.

Well, that sassy local Representative we have, anyway.

Stacie said...

sounds like the salon should be banned, not the waxing.

moooooog35 said...

I tried waxing a Brazilian once.

Fuckers scream like all get-out.

Makes sense to either outlaw it or require the use of ball gags.

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

I thought the government was already in our pants. Just saying.

Have a terrific day Crotchety. :)

Da Old Man said...

@ Sherry: When I visited your blog, I looked and saw we were in the bottom percentile. Doesn't surprise me at all. About all we have left is the right to remain silent.

@ Dizz: Of course.

@ Me-Me: No.

@ Shadow: That is frightening when it is outlawed. We spend years telling everyone to talk, then if they say something we don't like, they are censured.

@ Lauren: A gift certificate?

@ Reforming: I probably won't get anything waxed. I have an intense fear of pain.

@ BBW: Good luck with this.

@ Joanie: I know. All those Philly waxing salons would have made a fortune.

@ Don: She could clean up, even with the discount.

@ Kalos: I like that idea.
Yeti *snicker*

@ Shawn: Maybe you could invite her out for a waxing

@ Stacie: It happens. Board of Health should stop by and check it out.

@ Moooooog: I just assumed ball gags were included.

@ Sandee: Usually just the pockets, though.

Kirsten said...

Those damn Brazilians have to ruin it for everyone!

Swirl Girl said...

uh up, I sense another bail out coming....

Jen said...

Ooh Ooh! get something naughty waxed and then show us pictures.

Carl said...

I have been waiting for this day all my life. Here I come, New Jersey!!!

Lin said...

Uh oh, I had hernia surgery in January and I think I may have violated some law. Unless it is okay with a doctor's note. Well, if the hospital did it, are they responsible or am I? Who's gonna get the ticket? Or do you have to go to jail? Gees, look at all these questions! I think it best to let people do whatever they want with their hoochies.

Jenn Thorson said...

How does this fit in in your business plan with the Crotchety House of Worship... are you franchising?

Thinkinfyou said...

The name of your wax is quite catchy! I'd buy it!

Thinkinfyou said...

The name of your wax is quite catchy! I'd buy it!

dani c said...

OMG, I'm sooo never getting that done !!! Can't imagine waxing my "stuff"..

Judy said...

OMG...the gov't wants to get in my pants? The idea! How disturbing. As for genital waxing...OUCH!

Da Old Man said...

@ Kirsten: I know. It just takes one.

@ Swirl: Could be

@ Jen: The Crotchety Old Lady wouln't approve.

@ Carl: Welcome to NJ :)

@ Lin: It's ok with a doctor's note in triplicate.

@ Jenn: Franchising is the way to go. I'll be the McDonald's of Brazilian waxing.

@ Thinking: Cool, my first celebrity endorsement!

@ Dani: So, you won't be Jenn's first customer at the Pa. franchise?

@ Judy: Wax hurts.

The Self-Deprechaun said...

Old man, that is an image that i do not want burning in my head but to each his own, let the brazilians continue and here's to clean bikini lines Crotchety!

The Natural State Hawg said...

If you do get something waxed, please -- I beg you -- DO NOT blog about it. Under no circumstances are you to post photos (that goes without saying).

Fuzzy (and damned proud of it!) The Hawg

Stickman said...

Give me hairless genitals, or give me death! Just doesn't quite have the same ring to it. I bet their would have been a Newark Tea-Bag Party in protest had they outlawed it.

Anne said...

I have one word for you... Ouch! And if you are going to follow Jen's suggestion and post photos, please, please wait until you heal.

Da Old Man said...

@ Self: I'm with you on that.

@ The Hawg: No, I won't get anything waxed, and would never post pictures of it.

@ Stickman: Newarkers would have thrown shaving cream in the harbor in protest.

@ Anne: No worries.

HealthNutWannabeDad said...

New Jersey is seemingly the height of government intervention.

By the way, why do they call it Brazilian waxing?

Learn something every day...

Paul

Eat Well. Live Well.
ER BurnTheFat.com
PurpleGreenPops.com

ettarose said...

Crotchety, a radio station I listen to got one of the interns and made him get a Brazilian wax on the air. They did his front and then turned him over and did his back side. The screams emanating over the airwaves was like an air raid siren. I do not know why anyone would want that done anyways. Protect your naughty bits!

Janna said...

"Crotchety's Bucket O' Brazilian Home Waxing Kit"...

Just like a KFC bucket, except the thighs are a little more raw.