Friday, May 29, 2009

Caption Winner and Anal Bleaching

The staff at World Wide HQ and Discount House of Worship has been hard at work choosing a caption winner, and researching some important blog stuff. Stuff like, where have all our subscribers gone, and does it have anything to do with anal bleaching?

First things first, the contest. We had a clear winner, as one caption received more than half of the first place votes.

But, there were plenty of chuckle-worthy captions. Some made the judges laugh even if the commentor didn't mean to.
So, here are the ones who scored points this week: Jenn, Speak Dog, Husbands Anonymous, LL, Douglas Dyer, Haley, Moooooog, Gin, Lady Sarcasm, Lola, Kate, and Dani.

But the winning caption was

And then, one day Paris Hilton finally learned to recycle


Second place was Husbands Anonymous, and third was Haley.

Congrats to the winners, and thank you for another great contest.

Now, we need to solve the mystery of our disappearing subscribers.

Just before cracking the anal bleaching story, we had 77. Now, we are bottoming out at 61. Did anal bleaching put us behind?

I can't believe it was our bacon vodka post, because outside of Hassidic alcoholics, who could have been upset enough to unsubscribe because of that?

Our caption this? No, we have had too many eye bleeding pictures in the past to think anyone got upset by that.

And it can't be because our posts suck. We have been producing mediocre posts for over 5 years, and this is the first time we have dropped so severly since we began tracking such things.

Our staff will be working on this. Any clues are appreciated.



Janna said...

Yaaaaay! :)

Thank you, thank you!

P.S. Please don't tell Paris.

Mr. Condescending said...

congrats Janna, you deserved it.

Haley said...

Congrats to Janna - great caption.

Thanks to the Crotchety Old Man for the third place prize - It is very appropriate considering the theme - I was everyone's third choice at prom time!

jana said...

Congratulations to the winner! Well deserved...

LL said...

Congrats Janna... I knew it was a winner the moment I first saw it.

Me-Me King said...

Brilliant, way to go Janna, congrats!

Squidsquirts said...

wd Janna- nobody could beat that! And thanks to the Crotch panel, too :-)

Kathy said...

WTG Janna! You nailed it!

I wouldn't worry too much about the subscriber number fluctuating. Mine does that all the time, sometimes as much as a 20% drop. It always eventually comes back.

Moooooog35 said...

Your subscriber drop?

Can we still blame Bush for shit or have we completely moved on to blaming Obama now?

Politics confuse me.

A New Yorker said...

That was a good caption...but since I know the personalities of the's completely stacked against me even if I did come up with the best one.

Anne said...

It must be an issue with Feedburner. I can't imagine people would choose to unsubscribe. I have subscribed, but I noticed that Feedburner didn't add me to your count (maybe Google is out to get you).

ReformingGeek said...

Either the zombies or my toaster ate your subscribers.

Congrats Janna!

Donnie said...

Good going Janna! Not sure about the subscriber issue. I've always noticed that feedburner suffers these drops and then will catch up again. I have about 20 subscribers that went into another (old) feed. They're still there.

Winky Twinky said...

Congrats Janna!! That really was a good one!!

Anonymous said...

Congrats to Janna!

It was a great caption.

I love the captioning contests. They are fun.

Swirl Girl said...

This was a tough one to caption. At first - I thought it was a real dress. Then, I thought it was a dress full of commemorative 'cause' ribbons...then - upon closer inspection- I realized what it was and had to use an emergency eye wash.


Unknown said...

ROFLMAO...that is HILARIOUS..way to janna!!!

Chris said...

Did anal bleaching put us BEHIND? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Anonymous said...

Janna's was the best, good choice. She is such a strange and funny woman, I love her blog. (oops, is that bad manners to praise one blog on anther person's blog?)

brokenteepee said...

That WAS one funny had me spitting my grain at the computer.

I hope you find your missing subscribers. I am sure Abby had nothing to do with it, although one never knows with Abby....

DouglasDyer said...

Truly inspired. Please accept my propers, as the kids don't say.

Unknown said...

First, congrats to Jannatastic there for her cleverness!

And second, I think Feedburner is having issues. (surprise). My subscribers haven't gone down, but they haven't moved one jot on either blog, in too long a time, for it to not be a little suspicious.

Da Old Man said...

@ Janna: I won't tell Paris, though she likes any publicity.

@ Haley: Awww. I was turned down by all 3 I asked.

@ Kathy: Thanks. It just nosedived, and between the bacon vodka and anal bleaching, I was concerned.

@ Moooooog: I'm still blaming Nixon.

@ Anne: I'm sure the Google has it in for me.

@ Chris: At least someone caught that. Thanks.

@ Grace: No problem. Janna is one of my favorites, so it's all good.

@ Pricilla: I never thought about it, but Abby is just the goat to do something like that.

@ Jenn: Feedburner seems to have a lot of issues. Oh well.

Marie said...

Congrats you funny guys!!

As to declining couldn't be this week's caption this because, I can't believe I am saying this, I think the dress is rather pretty. I know, I know, I've been working from home for too long, I'm getting really weird.

It can't be your content, you're the BEST!!!

I think it is just glitches in the system. I have seen that happen to other people too. Everyone except my friend Marc, I talked him into started his blog and now he is wiping the blogosphere floor with me. lol He has tons of readers in just a few months. Stop by if you have a chance, he's great.

Lin said...

That's weird about the numbers drop--wonder what causes someone to quit you? Don't let it get you down--they weren't good subscribers anyway.

Da Old Man said...

@ Marie: I checked out his blog. Very interesting read.

@ Lin: Can't do anything about it anyway. Hope it's just a glitch.

Joanie said...

Well, I'm still here. maybe I should sign up for the feed.

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Anonymous said...

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Sabrina Moore said...

The anus is one of the most fragile sections of the human body so you would do good to consult a dermatologist before undergoing any bleaching process. Safety comes first!