Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Earthquake!!!!!

I feel the earth move under my feet......This no time for 70's tunes.

Run for your lives!!!!!!

It's the big one. NJ is sliding into the Atlantic!!!!

Oh wait. Nothing happened.

My bed shook a little.

But TV news is going crazy.

They have been reporting for an hour that nothing happened. They have all stated that there was a little shaking--that's it.

By the way, next time as you think about your tax dollars at work, think about this: Senator Frank Lautenburg from NJ will collect a six figure pension, get free medical care, Social Security, and other benefits.

He is worth 55 million dollars.

Good to see our elected officials take such good care of themselves.


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Saturday, August 20, 2011

Living on the Edge

In the news they stated that those who watch a lot of TV are as at risk for early, sudden death as smokers and couch potatoes.

I watch about 84 hours a week (is that a lot?) so I may not make it to the end of this post.

So far, so good. My fringers are crossed, which makes it really hard to type.

Every day, craziness surrounds us.

Tidbit in the local paper, "Jewish singles group to meet for lunch at Cheezeburger in Paradise."

Uhhhm, aren't cheeseburgers not Kosher?

I'm not Jewish, nor am I single, but I can laugh at it.

Is Justin Bieber the anti-Christ?

Discuss.



Mrs. C has been in a, shall we say, mood, lately.

Nope, I didn't do a thing to cause it.

Yeah, ok, I do tend to poke the bear occasionally.

It gets boring around here.


Stumpy still hasn't healed. When he does, he'll go to the hospital with me for a few weeks. We have to learn to walk again. It's been over 2 years.

Bye for now.








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Friday, August 12, 2011

WTF

There is a movement to have Bert and Ernie get married.

Really?

Bert and Ernie aren't gay and uhm....they're muppets'

Oy.


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Tuesday, August 09, 2011

Another Problem Solved

Ok, you know how those stupid flying carp are taking over some rivers in America? They destroy The native species and are a general PITA.

Ok, the government appropiates $10 mil (about what the military spends on those little plastic things on bootlace ends) to put a bounty on these fish, maybe a couple bucks each. Got to catch them with a net, not a drag seine, which would do too much damage to the ecosystem.

Take the fish to the cat food factory. Give it to them free.

So cat food drops in price. ranny with her 19 cats can get cheaper food, so naybe once a month or so, she orders a pizza.

So we provide employment, help the restuarnt industry, and hekp pizza delivery dudes.

Win-win-win.





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Sunday, August 07, 2011

What a week

My cather failed at dialysis, so went in to the hospital on Friday for replacement. Took 4 hours due to 3 and 45minutes of waiting. Then had to go back when it started bleeding when Mrs C brought me home. Back to hospital. All told we spent a bit over 8 hours.

Shark week is finally over. I'm afraid to even go near a kiddy blow up pool, cause it may have a small shark.

Here's a thought. Why not kill all the sharks? Yeah sure, Chinese people won't be able to eat shark fin soup. Hell, they eat enough weird crap, so too bad.

Ok, then the fish population will get too big. Our fish supplies are too low, anyway.

What about too many seals? Ship the seals to Alaska to feed the polar bears, which are starving and living on Coke and beer nuts. and kids from Connecticut.

So it's win-win-win.

Either that or we fit bears with scuba gear to fight the sharks.

Again win-win-win.

Today, watched the talking heads on PBS and they conclude we should spend our way out of the recession.

Great idea, everyone strart spending double your income. That should help.

Yeah, it sounds crazy, but they are on tv.

Solving the world problems 1 at a time.



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Thursday, August 04, 2011

Decisions, Decisions

Regular readers know that I'm in end stage kidney failure and on dialysis. Basically my kidneys are ornamental. So last week a nurse at dialysis suggested that I go on the waiting list for a transplant. I"ve given it a lot of thought and made a of the good and bad to decide. Maybe youse can read my list and help me. Even think of other reasons. if you can.

Bad....................................Good

Dead guy parts in my body.............;Write my name in the snow again

Another major operation................Nurses

Much more bathroom time..........,..,.,No dialysis

Lot of pain.......................... Really, really good drugs

Hospital food........................Nurse and drugs woohoo !!(seond mention of both
......................................mention of both)

No big screen TV and 180 channels.....Won't have to listen to Mrs. C"s soaps

See youse in a couple days.


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