Sunday, February 27, 2011

What I'm Pissed off About Today

How the heck did I manage tp post a blank page?

Anyway, today I'm pissed off by New Yorkers who went batshit crazy ond were offended by a billoboard against abortion. I don't care where you stand on the subject but blacks get a disproportianet amount of them. Why would pointing that out be offensive? Crack dealers all over the place, hookers flashing their naughty bits on the street, filth everywhere,this is what is offensive. Hard to understand.

Next, the government. Had to overhaul Medicare. Ok we all know there is fraud.

So now when I go to get my shoes, I have to go to at least 2 doctors, because there must be tons of shoe fraud because diabetic shoes are so damned sexy and stylish.

Grandma shoes are HOT!

Thursday, February 24, 2011

I've had the same 'do since I was 5 years old. Avoided the mullet, long hair, faux hawks and everything in between.

Hey, it was a classic.

But today, I needed to wash my hair and get a trim. Rather than go through all that, I shaved my head. I guess sometimes I'm an all or nothing guy.

By the way, how many of youse have had a conversation in your home that started out with "Now that you are afraid of meat again, mayne it's time you called the shrink."

I need to put her number on speed dial. I don't have issues, I have subscriptions.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Frosty Weather

Here at Casa Crotchety Mrs C was in a rather foul mood.

And why do youse automatically assume it was something I did?

Yeah, it's always the man, huh?
I know how youse think.

Blame Crutchety. I'm starting to get a complex. A persecution one at that.

Well, ok maybe it was my fault, but only a little. A teeny tiny speck of fault.


Stop looking at me that way.

Your acting like there's another woman involved.

Well sorta. But I am pure of action, heart, and mind. Hey, youse wonder how much trouble I can possibly get in with Mrs. C. without leaving the room. Youse would be surprised.

She'll probably warm up soon. I'm ao darn cute and charming. How could she resist? :)


Saturday, February 19, 2011

A Bit of Sanity

In this sue happy society it is nice to see when a lawsuit is dropped.

The woman who sued a store bhecause she had been "been injured as a result of defendant's fraudulent conduct," the now-dead suit stated.

The amount of the damages sought?

5 million dollars.

The disputed amount of damages that she started the lawsuit for?

80 cents.


Tuesday, February 15, 2011

A Belated Happy Valentines's Day

I'm recovering from yeaterday.


Just when you think you know a woman...there they go acting all crazy again.

As usual, I thought about a nice Valentine's gift for the Nrs.0. Been watching some fashion shows on tv. Belts are a great fashion accessory, so what could be better?


Pretty and practical. I suggested she could use it for kitchen tools, too. While she is at it, she could use the gps to find the kitchen.

Maybe I shoulda bought a card.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Your tax dollars at work

Sorry I haven't been posting lately.
I really should do more because after all youse guys pay for my dialysis @ $40,000 per month.

I'd like to thank you for that and probably owe you more than 1 lame post per week.

Oh yeah, and as for the disability check--thanks.

Though I am seeking work, but am pretty much undesireable for much more than a Wal-Mart greeter, and I can't do that very well.

Welcome to Wal Mart. What the hell do you want? When's my break time?

I spend a lot of time per day just thinking up stuff.

Every time I go to the hospital they give me plastic ware like toothbrush tubs, wash basins , and bedpans. To not be wasteful I do try to re-purpose them. Did you know bedpans make a dandy container for onion dip?

Well, that's pretty much all I've come up with.

I'll be getting an etsy listing and selling dip containers if anyone is interseted. They can also be used for bean dip and salsa.

Available in a festive pink. Quanities are limited.