Saturday, July 25, 2009

I Miss Hospital Food

Holy crap!!!!

The food in rehab makes hospital grub seem like haute cuisine.

Yesterday's meals were a new low.

Breakfast was corn flakes and a turkey sandwich.

Lunch was an plain omelet, they don't even give me ketchup, with a side of carrots. Lemon jell-o in a shape of a ring for dessert.

Dinner was spaghetti topped with ground beef, and a side of mixed vegetables.

Now I look ahead to next week. Sunday night dinner is cabbage soup. Photobucket

BTW, what the heck is turkey loaf?

The Crotchety Old Lady is gonna have to smuggle in rations.


ReformingGeek said...


Whew! I guess I'd better go eat breakfast again now.

You'd better start a list for the Mrs.!

Sandee said...

All that does indeed sound terrible as well. I'm sorry you aren't getting great food. Are you losing weight as a result? Probably.

I'm all for Mrs. Crotchety smuggling in some good eats.

Have a terrific day Crotchety. :)

Da Old Man said...

@ Reforming: I have a list already going

@ Sandee: Hard to tell as I'm losing so much weight due to the dialysis.

Donnie said...

That's sick! Corn Flakes and turkey sandwich? What the hell is that? Oh, I get it. They are trying to get you sick enough to have to go back to the hospital. It's a vast right wing conspiracy.

Anonymous said...

Just douse everything in salsa.

Salsa makes anything palatable!

heh heh

And it helps keep you "regular."

Yay for salsa!

nonamedufus said...

I can't believe there's something worse than hospital food. But after all you've been through, of course it would be you that discovered it (and was forced to eat it)! I feel for ya. Hang in there Joe.

memphisdonna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
memphisdonna said...

Word of Advice?
Do NOT under any circumstances ask what the turkey loaf is ~ or what anything is. Some things are better left a mystery!
((((((Joe & Mrs))))))

Anonymous said...

Cabbage Soup? What's the matter? Don't they like you?

Secondary Roads said...

Somebody down there hates you? Last time I was in the hospital, my roommate's wife smuggled in boxes of candy bars, chips and other munchies. I had to struggle to get down the broth and tapioca pudding (love it).

Unknown said...

Omigosh...what the heck are they doin' to u, Joe??? Gonna devise a way to upload some GOOD food to you before you upload that institution garbage! Mrs. Crotchety will sure find a way to slip you in some goodies. (( HUGS )) to you both!

lot 2 learn said...

Make sure the Mrs smuggles some of those asian nuggets in to ya !
Glad you are doin ok : )

Mrs Sweetwater said...

Joe, you are at a spa.
I know you are..
they have these spas in nj and I know you are at one.

you are not at a hospital, getting turkey loaf. you are probably hold up in the owners suite of the trump plaza in atl city, getting Lemon Jello Shots, HELLO. HA

Feel Better Old Man, we miss ya

Unknown said...

corn flakes and a turkey sandwich?! i think they are the ones on drugs! that's nastiful!

brokenteepee said...

I don't know about food but my father learned that if you put your beer in the toilet tank and flushed every 15 minutes it stayed cold...

Hospital tips for all.

Chris said...

I don't envy your situation, my friend. The spaghetti sounds okay, though...

Da Old Man said...

@ Don: Could be. At least that makes sense.

@ Quirky: They won't let me eat salsa.

@ Nonamed: Yeah, I'm lucky that way

@ Donna: Good advice

@ Barb: They don't care for my digestive system

@ Secondary Roads: Mrs has been sneaking in chicken

@ Judy: She promised some peaches tomorrow.

@ Lot2learn: That would be sweet

@ RE: If it's a spa, they need to talk to the chef

@ PJ: And it was

@ Pricilla: Good tip

@ Chris: Spaghetti needs tomatoes. It's a law.

Janna said...

Wait, waitwaitwait... am I to deduce from your response to Chris that the spaghetti had ONLY ground beef on it?
No tomato sauce with it?

Until I heard that, I was thinking "Mmmm, italian spaghetti sounds good!"

But there were no tomatoes? No tomato sauce? At all?

That's a crime against humanity.

Speaking of tomato-based crimes against humanity, why would you put ketchup on an omelet?.... ? :o

Unknown said...

FYI: Turkey loaf is like pork roll--only different.

Swirl Girl said...

just wait til you see what they charge you for 'room and board''d rather eat a board than that food!

Lipstick said...

Poor Crotchety!!! I just might spit up. At least they give you Jello...hard for them to screw up Jello.

BTW...thanks so much for visiting today!!!! I just got giddy when I saw your comment! :) (big giant smile)

Phillipia said...

I like Priscilla's suggestion...:)

tahtimbo said...

I never heard of lemon jello. I guess it takes a genius to mess-up jello. A turkey sandwich and corn flakes for breakfast?? Okay, that is just too weird.
Oh, a turkey loaf is ground turkey and corn flakes with a little lemon jello as a binder:)

Hope the menu gets better.

Da Old Man said...

@ Janna: Yes, it was only ground beef. No tomato sauce.
Eggs, whether omeletized or not, require ketchup.

@ FishHawk: That clears that up.

@ Swirl Girl: I know it's going to be a ridiculous amount.

@ Lipstick: True they have jell-o down pat.

@ Phillipia: It is a good idea

@ Tahtimbo: It wouldn't surprise me.


A New Yorker said...

Nope! No smuggling. You've been coddled enough which led to your couch stuck sitting and current situation. time for new ways without coddling and losing weight and working hard to heal your body. And i have an entire month off so you had better watch out!

Unknown said...

Blech! Maybe the hospital delivers? Who know maybe the nurses miss you enough to bring you out a "decent" meal. If not.. good luck!

psssssssssssssssssst you probably DON'T want to know what turkey loaf is..

Augusto said...

As weird as a turkey sandwich at breakfast is, I just returned from Kenya where they serve brown beans, practially cooked as baked beans, at breakfast. That is just wrong in so many ways.

Hope you are soon out of this horrific incarceration.


Unknown said...

that is some crazy bad food!

get better and get outta there!!!

Nooter said...

you could try bribing the guards maybe they would look the other way while someone places half a coconut in your daily soup. chew it thoroughly and swallow the pulp for energy

Da Old Man said...

@ Lauren: She smuggles in healthy food, as opposed to the crap they serve here.

@ Dizzblnd: The wife brings in good stuff. I can't count on the nurses.

@ Augusto: Beans sounds worse.

@ Tony: I'm doing my best.

@ Nooter: That's an idea.

Kate said...

So glad you're feeling good enough to complain about the food! Keep fighting the good fight!

Marsha said...

Haha. That smiley actually looks like he's puking cabbage soup.

What a dumb thing to serve in a facility that already has enough gross smells. Geesh.

And who the hell serves a turkey sandwich for breakfast?

I hope you get sprung soon Crotchety.

Joel Klebanoff said...

You asked, what the heck is turkey loaf? My experience has been that, when it comes to food, if it doesn't have a foreign name, but you still have to ask what it is then you almost certainly don't want to know.

Unknown said...

I vote for smuggling in some tasty food - or at least something to spice up what you're getting.

Da Old Man said...

@ Kate: I'm trying

@ Marsha: As do I

@ Joel: Good advice

@ Sherry: She does. Dinner was cabbage soup and a hot dog. What kind of food is that for a sick person?

Janna said...

I found some recipes for turkey loaf here and here and here. Oh, and here's one that's served cold like a big ol' slab of jello. Check out the picture.

Good luck.

Lola said...

You need Mrs. C to smuggle in a bottle of ketchup. You can use it for those emergencies, like sauce less spaghetti and eggs (if you must).

D.S. said...

From green jello to lemon jello, that's at least one good thing.

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

A plain omelette? Isn't that just...scrambled eggs?

Sorry I'm just now catching up on your adventures - I was out of town for a few days, but I'm back to say hello and howyouse?

Jaya said...

Turkey loaf is made from turkeys who spent their turkey lives just loafing around. Eating it on a regular basis can lead to apathy and a lack of desire to accomplish anything worth accomplishing.

Obsessive consumption of turkey loaf can lead you to an early death, with your corpse being made into a 'human loaf' which is then used as turkey feed. Turkeys who are fed a diet high in human loaf are more likely to wind up as the main ingredients in turkey loafs. It is a sad and ugly cycle...