Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Just one more thing

Ok, most of youse know I've had a lot of stuff. Heart attack, congestive heart failure, depression, skin cancer, kidney failure, amputations, belly button removal and stroke.

Now what?

Athlete's foot.

I am transported by ambulance to dialysis and come home the same way. I only leave the house for doctor's appointments.

Basically, I'm treated like veal.

How the hell did I get Athlete's foot?

Since there is only half the feet of a normal person, I have 50% lesser chance than you.

But no, I got it.

What will I get next?

My money is on some rare disease discovered in the upper reaches of MONGOLIA.

And only found in left- handed goat herders.


Jenn of Many Cabbages said...

Hmmm... after Athlete's Foot, let's see... Ring worm? Malaria? Accidentally pick up one of those little fish that live in only the Amazon River and which swim up the urethra to your bladder? Because, honestly, Crotchety, that's about all new that's left. (Stay out of kiddie pools, I beg you.)

Sandee said...

Check Mrs. C's feet. Just saying.

Have a terrific day. :)

Unknown said...

damn. {hugs from a safe internet distance}

ReformingGeek said...

Haha Sandee's comment.

I'm sorry. It must have been in those cushy socks I sent you.

Gianetta said...

Crabs, maybe?

Deb said...

Of course you got athlete's foot. Your athletic endeavors are well known.

middle child said...

Just wondering....have you been to a gynecologist? Yeah, that's about the only kind of doctor my husband HASN'T been to. Wishing you well. {{{hugs}}}

vanilla said...

ain't that a nitch?

LL said...

I always knew you were special...

Da Old Man said...

@ Jenn: I have something to look forward to. I'll contact the local hospital to be alert for me to show up with something new for them, instead of the usual. Really test them.

@ Sandee: They are kind of smelly.

@ Stacie: Back atcha

@ Reffie: I thought they smelled funny. Maybe Mrs. C wore them.

@ MAFW: Well I do like seafood.

@ Deb: True, in high school I was on the varsity chess team.

@ Middle Child: Nope, but I worry what he will find.

@ Vanilla: Indeed

LL: You mean short bus special, or some other type?