How It went from a Recession to a Depression

For quite a few months, maybe even years, the economic talk has been that we (and by we I mean the world) are in the midst of a recession, while some economists have stated that it is a Depression.

I'm not sure how this is determined, and it really doesn't matter.
As of Wednesday, it officially became a Depression. The Crotchety Old Lady was laid off.

So, now I'm concerned. I need to find her a job. Quickly.

I spend my day doing important things, and she gets in the way, wanting do stuff like talk, and

Now, TV is one of my favorite things, but I watch important things like Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Step by Step, Comedy Central, Food Network, ESPN, YES (Yankee games), and Spongebob. She watches stupid stuff like soaps and movies.

My routine is pretty much set, and with Twitter, and blogging, and TV watching, there is no time for stuff like entertaining her. So, apparently, I'll have to take time out of my busy day to find employment for her.

Let's see, she is really good at shoveling snow, but that tends to be seasonal, and it will be at least 6 months or more until we get any more of that cold white here fluff here.

Pirates are in the news, so maybe she could get a job as a pirate

Rocking it as a plus size pirate

She could pull off the look, but on a ship, she insists on drinks being brought to her, and having access to a buffet every 4 hours. I don't think most pirate ships are staffed like the Pacific Princess.

Lots of older Americans are finding second careers and they work at Wal Mart

We do have one right down the street from us, so that is a possibility.

I did think about sending her to MickeyD's for a job, unfortunately, she only speaks English

Que?

Any other suggestions would be welcome. She has a lot of good qualities. She's good at shoveling snow, yard work, and cooking my dinner. I could teach her about blogging so both of us can not make money by blogging.

Forget that. I need to encourage her to get out and find a job before she drives me crazy. It's already been 2 loooooong days.

http://www.humorbloggers.com/

A Mind is a Terrible Thing Part 2

Those who know me well fully understand that my mind works in a weird way.

Things set me off that don't even register for the normal person. The truly wacky part is I am drawn to things that I know are going to set me off.

One thing that can, and often does really get me depressed is certain TV shows. I truly have a love-hate relationship with my TV. One program in particular causes me to become either depressed or enraged, and oftentimes both. It can set me into the deepest realm of the most dark green-black chasms of despair, with suicidal tendencies. I become overwhelmed with self-loathing, the likes of which few men have ever cast upon themselves. Other times, it can make me white hot with fury, the kind few men have endured.

What show can do this? Which one can inspire such negative emotions within me?

By now, most have probably guessed the answer. No show puts me on such a negative emotional roller coaster as Antiques Roadshow.

Something about it just pisses me off, yet like a 15 car pile-up on the interstate, I have to watch. I try to convince myself that this episode will be different. This time I will learn about antiques and a bit of history, and not delve into the deep morass that is the blackness in the hole in my soul.

But no, once again those bastards at PBS, one of whom is surely the Antichrist, compels me to watch and destroy my inner self.

**sigh**



Santa gets an appraisal