Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving and more

Wanted to wish everyone a happy Thanksgiving. Long story, as to why post is late. I'll explain in the next day or so. Nothing terribly bad.

Anyway, I'm at sister's house, and we'll soon be playing Risk, which is a family tradition.

We have some quirky parts of the game, which are pretty interesting.

To begin with, the colors of each army have fierce names. I usually play as the Black Death.

My brother in law or nephew will be the Bluebonic Plague. And the other will be Yellow Fever.

The Red Menace used to be my father, so it has been retired. No one ever has been Gangreen, and if my sister or wife plays (not thesame person,) they get to be the ever so girlie Pink Eye.

The game lasts a while, and nearly every year, the game ends the same way, my nephew cheats. I've never caught him cheating, but it is so obvious. With my superior intellect, and vast knowledge of miltary history and tactics, and incredible dice rolling ability, I should easily win every game in minutes. But noooooooooooo. He resorts to cheating, and may gain a slight advantage. At that time, for reasons totally unknown, there is often a rumble in the distance, and an earthquake hits the board and flips it upside down, scattering pieces everywhere.

In case you are wondering, I have never lost a game of Risk yet.

And don't tell my nephew, but I have a new strategy. I'm conquering Greenland first. Yes, Greenland, whose principle exports are whale blubber and Eskimo Pies (main ingredient--whale blubber) will be the center of my empire. (Insert evil laugh)

Have a happy and safe Holiday. Don't forget, the captions are still being accepted, and the voting polls are still open for humorblogger of the year. Type to you tomorrow.


Anonymous said...

Have a happy Thanksgiving! Conquer Greenland extra viciously for us.

Krissi said...

(Insert evil laugh here) ahhh Greenland shall be yours Crotchety! Hope you guys have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!! Greenland Domination shall be yours!!!!

eve cleveland said...

Soon as I clean up here, I am fixin' to go to Greenland and make them look at your blog. Where the h#ll is that country?

Adullamite said...

On the BBC World Service this morning a representative of those who wish Greenland to separate from Denmark was putting forth his opinions.
Greenland has people who speak English (and understand American), they know how to use the phone so they ought to be able to log on to you Joe!
However, if they receive independence they may charge you a tax to call!

Paul Eilers said...

For reasons known only to her, my wife volunteered to host her
side of the family on Turkey Day.

So we will have over 25 relatives in our home, eating, being loud, and running in and out of the house.

After it is all said and done, we will be pressure washing the inside
and taking all broken fixtures and electronic items to Goodwill.

Happy Thanksgiving Crotchety Old Man!

Jormengrund said...

For Thanksgiving: Greenland..

Tomorrow, The WORLD!

*maniacal laugh inserted here*

Sorry, I had a nasty Austin Powers flashback going on there for a second.. I think I'm better now.

Hope you had a great Turkey day Joe!

Chunks of Reality said...

I loved this post! LOLOL

I haven't played Risk IN AGES!! Now I want to go out to Wal-Mart and buy that game.