Believe it or not

I'm Home

At the rehab, the computer has been down for weeks so here's what's been going on.

The other day I was chased around by a little Asian woman with a commode. On my last day I pooped in it, and you have never seen a woman more excited to see me take a poop. Actually sounds like she may be my type of woman.

Guess what they put on Stumpy last week

No, not baby foreskin.

Give up?

A patch made from pig testicles.

When Joe gets around a rasher of bacon (insert your own joke here, I know most of you will.





http://www.humorbloggers.com

Finally...progress

Seems that lately all I've written about is what body part was lost (total to date for new readers: leg, kidneys, belly button, mind) but today there's some good news.

I can lift my fat butt up and stand on my one leg by myself. Taa Daaah!

Once Stumpy heals I'll be able to get a table leg or something, strap it on, and get the hell out of here.

By the way, am I the only one who wondered if those trapped miners got straight pay or time and a half while they were in the mine.

How sick are you with political commercials? Are these lowlifes the best we have? And why do they spend many millions for a job that pays maybe $100 K?

It's been a rough week for me with my Yankees (sniff, whimper) losing embarassingly to Texas. A Rod gets like 27 mil per year. You'd think maybe he could get a couple hits? Well, it's not really his fault. Remember Babe Ruth visited a hospital and promised a sick kid that he would hit a homer for him? Well it seems that A Rod visited a sick kid, too. And he promised him a grounder to second.

I hope to get on the puter soon. In the meantime, Hey Kevin, call me.


http://www.humorbloggers.com