It's Opening Day

Finally. The Yankees were rained out, but that makes me pretty happy. They play tomorrow, which is my birthday (yeah, what a surprise, April Fool's Day) and I'll be in Atlantic City wearing my birthday present. A Joba Chamberlain shirt. Yeah, it's kind of wacky wearing a shirt with another guy's name on it, but it's not like I'm wearing Joba's bowling shirt because we're going steady.
Since it's opening day, here's my predictions for the division champions

AL East
Do you really need to ask?
Yankees, Yankees, Yankees. Pitching is going to be ok, and they score like a machine.

AL Central
The Tigers and the Indians are the obvious choices. I'm going with the Indians. CC and Carmona are just so dominant.

AL West
It's gonna be the Angels.

Wild card will be the Red Sox

If they can keep those stupid bugs away, Yankees will beat Cleveland for the AL Championship.

NL East
The Mets look good with Santana, as long as they can get one more year out of Pedro. Maine is looking good, too. I predict a big year for him.

NL Central
It's been 100 years since the Cubbies won the Series. This ain't the year, but at least they will take the division.

NL West
Everybody is going with the Rockies or the d'Backs. I'm going against conventional wisdom, and picking the Padres. I'm not sure why, maybe I'm just feeling religious.
The Phils will take the wild card.

The Mets pitching is strong in a short series, so I look for them to return to the Series.

Should be a re-match of the Subway Series of 2000, and while I'm rooting for the Yankees, I'm predicting a Mets win, but I won't be happy about that. It's almost as bad as a Sox win.

My Guilty Pleasure

Everyone has them. The little silly thing we do or enjoy that, while not necessarily bad for us, is something that not a lot of people know about us. It's usually something we like to keep secret, too. Or that we only share with a few others. Here's possibly my biggest guilty pleasure: I like Kiddie movies. A lot.

Monsters, Inc. That was a "Date night" flick with the Crotchety Old lady. I promised to take her out to see some romsntic chick flick, and when we got to the theater, I went to get the tickets while she procured the popcorn and Milk Duds. What a surprise!!! The chickflick was sold out , but they fortuitously had 2 seats for Monsters, Inc. So we were the only two adults there without kids.

I liked Finding Nemo, Cars, all the Muppet Movies, and most Disney movies. In fact, kiddie movies are perfect for me because I have a short attention span, and hate to think while being entertained. I prefer mindless drivel most of the time.

Last night, we saw what may be one of my all-time favorites: Wallace and Gromit in the Curse of the Were-Rabbit. The movie was funny, sweet, and in a way, geared towards a more mature audience. Inferences were present throughout to such classic horror movies as Frankenstein, various were-wolf flicks, King Kong, and others. The movie had plenty of little jokes, ones kids would surely miss, but which would make an adult laugh out loud. This is available on DVD, and if you enjoy movies that are just simple entertainment, pure and without those nasty additives that require an in-depth thought process, I highly recommend this film. It's suitable for the entire family, and can be enjoyed by all on many levels.

Man vs Wild

Yeah, I know that is the name of some cable TV program which I've never seen. The premise just seems a little too contrived even for me. And that's saying a lot. I watched a TV show about Cavemen in our midst. I can even sing the theme song from "My Mother, the Car," generally considered to be the worst show of all-time. But I digress. This quote really made me think today:

I would feel more optimistic about a bright future for man if he spent less
time proving that he can outwit Nature and more time tasting her sweetness
and respecting her seniority.
E. B. White

I'm just feeling all warm and fuzzy lately, with a desire to commune with nature. I don't know if it's a result of spring or just advanced cabin fever. I have this overwhelming desire to frolic in the woods. This is kind of strange since I haven't frolicked since 1974, I believe it was early June of that year.

Nevertheless, The Old Man is feeling pretty good. Life's sweet nectar flows into every pore of his being. I'd start quoting poetry, but the only line I know is from Jabberwocky:
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'
He chortled in his joy.

For some reason, that just seems to fit today.

A Peaceable Kingdom

I have seen pictures in biblical scenes with the lion laying with the lamb. I've always used the expression "fought like cats and dogs." Certain animals are just "natural enemies."
But, I know a lady who works in animal rescue. She goes by the online name "Snickerdoodles."
She rescues animals, both wild and tame, and rehabilitates them. What is truly remarkable, is that many of them spend considerable time in her home.

Just looking at some of these photos totally amazed me.
http://yankeefansforever.yuku.com/topic/385
Cats sleeping fitfully next to dogs; birds nuzzling cats; bunnies running free.

It just makes me wonder about the human condition. With love and proper care, such as food and health care, these "enemies" are able to coexist. I wonder why humans, the highest order of animal, hasn't figured this out yet?

By the way, this is a picture of Katy. She was a rescue from New Orleans. Most folks would say it's hard to find anything good that came out of Hurricane Katrina, but Katy and Snickers may not share that opinion. Katy is a sweetheart, just look at her face. You'll find plenty of pictures of her posted at my board, and at ebay's Soapbox. She likes to get dressed up and celebrate all the Holidays. A true party animal. And she gets along with all the cats and other critters. If possible, open your heart and rescue an animal today. So many need homes, and would love to become a part of your family like Katy.

Opening Day is coming soon

Opening Day for the Yankees is just a few days away. This is my favorite time of year. Hope springs eternal as the Yankees have not yet lost a game, and they have a chance to win 162 games. I know it won’t happen. In fact, the greatest teams in history lost 50 games or so in the year they established themselves with great seasons. Losing 1 out of 3 games will make for a record setting season.
The game has changed a lot since I was a kid. In fact, it’s not the same game it was 20 years ago. It’s become totally different as a starter pitches 6 innings in a game. When Gossage was the dominant closer in baseball, a closer usually pitched 2 innings or more to earn his save. Now, Rivera, Papelbon, and most closers are one inning or so. Starting pitchers, who as recently as the 80’s, used to pride themselves on finishing what they started. I remember when I was a kid, a starter pitched 40 games, and went 300 innings. Today, that is unheard of. Middle relievers were guys who either were washed up starters, or rookies just trying to impress. Today, they are an integral part of the game, and considered nearly as important as having a good starter and closer. Back in the 70’s, Wilbur Wood, a knuckleball specialist, even started both games in a doubleheader. He relieved a few games in between starts. As Casey Stengal said, “You can look it up.” Teams had a “Big Four” and a spot starter for doubleheaders.
Now we have 5 starters and several middle relievers and at least one closer.
By the way, what ever happened to the double header? Nothing was better than to go to the ballpark for a double dip on Sundays. But big money contracts have made the freebie game a thing of the past. The day-night double header just isn’t the same. I used to enjoy the strategy a manager had to use to be prepared to play two. Couldn’t burn out the staff in game one, and had to decide which catcher to use to best advantage to win them both.
Just one more thing given up for money.

Happiness

A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but
rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.
Hugh Downs

Why are all those who tell us the secret to happiness are wildly successful? It's never Bernie, the schmoe who works in customer service and gets yelled at all day? It's always some famous person who has led, more or less, a charmed life. I know money doesn't make one happy, but the lack of it sure can make one miserable.

I wonder what is the source of happiness? Where does contentment come from? Is it from having just enough, or the ability to do what one wishes?

My contention is that real contentment in life comes from the ability to make a difference; to feel useful. Whether one wishes to make life better for one's family or to change the world, usefullness is the key to happiness. Anyone can make money, a lot of it, but the richest men who ever walked the planet became philanthropic in their old age. Rockefeller, Carnegie-- the lot of them, they all became very charitable men in their old age.

In Carnegie's own words "The man who dies leaving behind him millions of available wealth, which was his to administer during life, will pass away "unwept, unhonored and unsung".... Of such of these the public verdict will then be: "The man who dies thus rich dies disgraced."

Some food for thought.

It's beyond words

Florida high school senior Stephanie Kuleba had everything going for her -- she was the well-liked captain of her varsity cheerleading team at West Boca High School, and she had been accepted to the University of Florida, where she hoped to study medicine...According to just released data from the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, nearly 348,000 breast augmentation procedures were performed in 2007, a 64 percent increase from 2000....

The American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery reported that between 2002 and 2003, the number of women and girls younger than 18 who got breast implants nearly tripled, from 3,872 to 11,326. ...

Doctors also say they are seeing more parents giving their teens the gift of new breasts or other cosmetic surgery for milestones like birthdays or graduations.

"I've seen an increase in teens having plastic surgery, and certainly for graduation," said Dr. Stephen T. Greenberg, a New York plastic surgeon and the author of "A Little Nip, A Little Tuck."

http://www.abcnews.go.com/GMA/PainManagement/story?id=4520099
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oy vey. I just don't get it. What message are we giving to young women that so many need to undergo such extreme measures? Obviously we reinforce in them that breast size (any physical trait, really) is more important than it should be. Is this a reflection of our society that demands instant gratification, whereby a person undergoes butchering (ooops, I mean gastric bypass) rather than a sensible way to get one's weight under control? By the way, the medical community lies about mortality rates in most surgeries. They claim gastric bypass is lower than 5%, when it is probably closer to 10% or more for men. Just from personal experience, I know 9people who had the operation. 2 died, and 2 gained their weight back. And one has been so sick in the 5 years since her operation she almost wishes she died. Not exactly a scientific sample, but sure doesn't convince me that the doctors are telling everyone the truth.
I'm willing to bet it's the same with breast augmentation surgery. I'm sure they sold Stephanie Kubela and her parents on the safety of the operation. So, a young woman with the promise of a great life before her, died from complications of an operation she did not need.

It's beyond words.

It's all about the Benjamins

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

I just found this classic blog from Sunday, 10 April 2005

As NJ gets deeper in debt, and faces tax and toll increases, this just seems so timely.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jon Corzine is running for Governor of NJ this year.

He bought the Senate seat for $66,000,000 a few years ago. I wonder what the governorship will cost him?

Anyway, I read in the Ledger today that he contributed over $800,000 to one PAC in 2001. The guy (Norcross)who controls that PAC is in big trouble for some illegal crap, so Corzine stated that he will not contribute any more cash to this PAC.

Of course, over the last 3 years, Corzine has contributed $270,000 to PAC's that benefit Norcross.
It's a joke.

And the punchline is taxpayers ultimately foot the bill when corruption rears its ugly head.

I'm not against government spending. It's a necessity. But waste is another thing.

Again, according to today's Ledger, since 1997, the NJ Department of Banking and Insurance, has spent $5,000,000 on travel expenses. That's 3/4 of a million per year. This includes sending 9 employees to a conference in Anchorage, Alaska.

Anybody else surprised our state is bankrupt?

And now, the final indignity.

My beloved Giants want to build a new stadium.

Cost to NJ?

0.00

And, the government is opposed to it.

They claim it's because they will lose the money they make leasing out the current stadium for concerts. Typically short sighted.
Or lies.

You decide.

A new stadium will generate jobs, and bring pride to Jersey. The stadium will be bigger (currently Giants tickets are sold out for many years in advance) and should bring in much revenue in sales tax. What will we lose?

The Meadowlands maroons want to build a shopping center, not a stadium.

Brilliant.

We need another mall like Rt. 1 needs more potholes.

Classic blog

I've been blogging for a few years, so I decided to post a classic rant from three years ago. It's still relevant.

Sunday, 20 March 2005
Why I hate the FDA and FTC-a few more reasons
Now Playing: That 70's Show
Topic: Political Rant
News Note:
The Congressman who was chairman of the committee that regulates prescription drugs has retired.

Billy Tauzin, former Congressman from La., the co-sponsor of the Medicare Bill that is causing so many problems for poor people (especially seniors and the disabled) has left Congress to enter private industry.

He has accepted a $2,000,000 per year position as president of the Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America.

Is anybody else surprised that the person responsible for record drug company profits gets rewarded with a nice little job like that?

Laughter

Laughter is the best medicine according to a popular belief. A study by a team of University of Maryland School of Medicine researchers, led by Dr. Michael Miller, has recently shown for the first time that laughter is linked to healthy function of blood vessels. Miller said that the most significant study finding was that "people with heart disease responded less humorously to everyday life situations." They generally laughed less, even in positive situations, and they displayed more anger and hostility.
http://www.umm.edu/features/laughter.htm

Recently I was speaking on the telephone with a friend of mine concerning laughter.
We both would rather have a good laugh than fight. Yet, it seems many others prefer fighting. I don’t mean the occasional spirited debate, but instead, battling and sniping at one another just for the rush. My buddy shared a very interesting anecdote. His parents had been in one of Hitler’s Concentration Camps and obviously suffered abuse beyond comprehension. Sometimes the depths of man’s inhumanity to man just boggles one’s mind. But what my friend’s Mom remembers is that the survivors were the ones who laughed. She said she could almost tell who was going to die because they were the morose ones. Quiet, almost accepting death as an inevitable outcome of their situation.

But the ones who laughed, yes even laughed at the fact they were little more than skin and bones, they lived and they were the ones who made it out alive.

I’ve seen various techniques where people just laugh for the heck of it as part of their fitness regiment, and who knows if that works. As for me, just photoshop a geek in a compromising situation, and I’m laughing until I cry.

So, for today, find something to make you chuckle. Hell, chortle if you want. If I were a real doctor, and not just playing one on the internet, I’d suggest you take two hearty guffaws, rest, and get plenty of fluids.

Some odds and ends

I got this whole Larry King vibe going on today.

Why do so many insist in saying the Lord’s Prayer using Elizabethan English? Once, someone told me it’s because of the continuity; that is, they were able to pray the same way their ancestors did. I guess it depends on who your ancestors were. Some of mine barely spoke English, and I doubt they were conversant in Olde English. It’s just stupid.

I just saw some chocolate shop in Soho is selling chocolate covered bacon.
http://www.vosgeschocolate.com/product/
bacon_exotic_candy_bar/exotic_candy_bars
Just when you thought you saw it all. I guess they go with chocolate Easter eggs.

Barry Bonds still doesn’t have a job in the majors. I wonder if he were a different type of person, would there be a team willing to take him on? A bad attitude along with declining skills may just be the formula for his retirement. But before anyone feels sorry for him, he has had a long career and made many millions of dollars.

Vicodin is my favorite prescription drug. It has replaced Percosets in getting rid of my pain. I fully understand how someone could get addicted to them.

Game shows have changed so much over the years. Jeopardy required skill, even Wheel of Fortune required a little bit of puzzle solving ability (though not much.) Today’s popular game shows? Deal or no Deal. I like it, but it’s a guessing game. And when one gets to the point they have limited safety, they take the deal. Ok. I get it. DOND is pretty much just gambling, hosted by a comedian and pretty models.


Are You Smater Than a 5th Grader is Jeopardy for morons. The Price is Right is starting to look more like a challenge each day. Plinko rocks.

My Redneck Wedding

The writer’s strike is finally over, and something good did come out of it. Due to incredible boredom, I searched the other 180+ channels on my TV for something different. Reruns aren’t anathema to me. As a matter of course, I can watch the same Simpsons episodes over and over, and even can find comfort in them. Same thing with Futurama and Family Guy. But many of today’s shows I can barely tolerate more than once. Go figure.
But I digress.
I have started watching CMT, and have found a few shows that are incredibly entertaining.
My Redneck Wedding has to be one of the most bizarre shows on TV. As you can probably guess from the title, rednecks get married and have the most "unusual" weddings. Whether they feature a trellis made out of beer cans or mud wrestling, these weddings are not for the feint of heart. The bride is more likely to arrive via ATV or horseback than limo.
And because the bride and groom want their guests to have a good time, they arrange special events. I thought long and hard to try to remember anything at a traditional wedding besides dancing. A redneck wedding apparently includes everything from a demolition derby to mattress surfing to dining on squirrel, wild boar, and whatever else runs through the nearby woods. And mass quantities of beer are consumed, naturally.
In keeping with our Redneck expectations, the gifts exchanged between the bride and groom are equally, for lack of a better term, non-traditional.
Could be a pink rifle, or something obtained by dumpster diving.
You can’t make this stuff up.
I usually rate these shows based upon my 1-10 scale. This show was hard to rate. But using my scientifically designed scale, it comes in at a solid 6.2



A quick review of my ratings system:
10--a prime show. The Sopranos or 24 would rate a 10.
9-- definately worth watching. Think South Park or Seinfeld re-runs. Not as funny as the first time, but still great TV fare.
8-- Pretty darn good stuff. If you can't be home, you'd consider setting up the DVR. Some solid 8's would be Earl, or Everybody Hates Chris.
7-- Not quite good enough to tape. But you can look forward to watching. The Office is the first show that comes to mind as a 7.
6-- Now we get into the shows that are ok, but only a first choice if other shows are re-runs. You won't mind watching a 6 at a different time. Britcoms are 6's.
5-- Think of a movie you liked, but have seen a dozen times or more. You'd choose the movie over the program, then the program is a 5. Mash and almost everything on TVLAND has become a 5.
4-- Crappy show, but with some redeeming quality, like it features hot chicks. Any show with Pam Anderson would be a 4.
3-- Only worth watching if the only alternative is infommercials. Fishing shows are 3.
2-- About the same as a good infommercial. QVC is a 2.
1-- Infommercials, unless they are The Knife Collector Show. They sell swords!

Imprisoned

The Crotchety Old Lady has been out of work for the last few weeks due to surgery. So I begrudgingly have turned over the remote to her during the day. My day is now filled with such testosterone sapping TV fare as soap operas and Oprah.
I can’t get into the soaps because it seems every single one has the following script:
Chase has an affair with Veronica, but hopes that Michael, his half-brother doesn't find out. Great mental anguish ensues. But, of course, Michael has been having an affair with Celeste, while Conchetta, the poor but honest maid (who naturally does not know she is the illegitimate love child of Chase's Dad, Devon) falls in love with Michael's business rival. Then, Bram, a devilishly charming, filthy rich businessman from some country where they speak English, either Oz or Fiji, constructs a plan to win the heart of Veronica.
Sure, some of the names are changed around, but they always use proper names or some uncommon name like Logan or Ridge. Every once in a while a Rick or Johnny sneaks in, but one will never find a Dave on a soap opera. Soaps are also great for characters named Lucky, Sonny, or some other name that hasn’t been heard since the late 70’s. Personally, I’ve never known anyone with such a moniker, but apparently, these are pretty common in soaps.
My daily soap marathon ends just in time for Oprah. I don’t get Oprah. She has some decent guests, but she may have the most annoying delivery on television. Much of the time, she sounds like a game show host on steroids as she yells out the guest’s name or some gift for the audience. I’m sure she is a nice lady, but do I really need to hear her yell out DOCTOR OZ!!! She must be doing something right, as she makes a bazillion dollars and has launched a few very successful shows, produced movies, and publishes a magazine. I should only be so successful.

Spring training time

I've been watching the Yankees on YES, and they are looking ready for a great season. The young pitchers seem to be maturing at just the right time, and the older guys like Moose and Pettitte are pitching like they did a few years ago. Wang has the most wins over the last 2 years in the AL, and I have no reason to think he won't crack the 20-win mark this year. Joba was supposed to be a starter, but I'm not sure he is ready for that role.

As far as the regular lineup, it's hard to find any weak spot. In no particular order:
Cano is coming off a terrific sophomore season, and should be even better this year.
Jeter is once again ready to do what he does best--win. I'm looking for a big year from the Captain. A-Rod even made him the earlky season favorite for the MVP award.
And speaking of MVP, can A-Rod repeat his MVP season of 2007? Can I get a hell, yeah? He is just reaching his prime, and may be even better this year.
Melky just gets better every year. While he may not be a power hitter in the Yankees centerfield tradition of Mantle and DiMaggio, he plays a great defense, and his arm has earned respect around the league.
Damon looks to be over his nagging injuries from last year, and gives the Yankees a lead off batter with pop and speed. Rickey Henderson without the attitude.
Godzilla should be back with his usual dependable play and decent power, along with the clutch hitting that has become synonymous with the name Matsui.
Abreau at 34 should give us the OBP and keen eye that drives opposing pitchers crazy.
Even the bench looks strong with Duncan and Betemit.
My only concerns are Giambi and Posada. They are both coming off decent seasons, but 36 year-old catchers can be injury prone. And Giambi, although he looks pretty good, is coming off a year in which he only played 83 games.
I'd love to say I'm looking at a team like the '98 squad, but sadly, not. I expect the team to challenge for the division, probably even win it. But this year, the playoffs will be different. I expect to sweep through them like a hot knife through butter. This team is built for the playoffs. Just as long as those freakin' bugs don't show up in Cleveland.

Congratulations to the G-Men

Yesterday’s Super Bowl may have been the best game ever. Whenever Big Blue is in the Big Game, it will be exciting and memorable. Whether it was Phil Simms leading the Giants to a big win based on 22 of 25 passing, or Scott Norwood missing a field goal to end the game, it’s never boring. And yesterday may have been the best of the best. Eli’s drive for the game winning touchdown with about a minute to go was unbelievable. Everyone in America knew it was going to be a pass to Burress, but the Pats couldn't stop it.
I couldn’t sleep last night. I was just so worked up after all the excitement of the huge upset.
And, spring training starts in about 2 weeks.
Sweet.

Goodbye 2007

I don’t believe in time measurement as very significant on a day to day basis. Is the day one turns 50 any different than the day before? Just as January 1st truly is no different than December 31st . That said, I’m still happy to see 2007 come to an end. It was, without a doubt, from beginning to end, the worst year of my life.
January 3rd I was in the hospital and awaited amputation. It only turned out to be one toe, but it still was a lousy way to start the year. And it didn’t get much better. Because my foot is now turned as ligaments have been severed, my rehab assignment turned into a disaster. I developed a wound on my foot that still has not healed.
In April, my Mom passed away after her battle with cancer.
In June, I found my ass back in the hospital as I had been vomiting for over a week. During that time, I had a colonoscopy, and got 4 transfusions. They checked out everything they could, and found nothing. Of course, they missed one big thing, and that led to my hospitalization in Ct. I was on vacation in August, and thought I was having a heart attack. I got a quick tour of the Ct. countryside in an ambulance, which would have been much more pleasant if I had been able to breathe. This hospital trip turned out to be a good thing. I had congestive heart failure, and the local doctors had missed that I was retaining water like a friggin’ sponge. I peed out gallons over the next few days, and lost 40 pounds in 4 days.
September-- how much trouble can I get into sitting on my couch? Apparently, quite a bit. I went out one day to see my friend, and tripped on the way in. Ripped up my toes, and they are still not healed. I also had my foot rub against something, and a wound opened up. When did I become so damned delicate?
In October, I had skin cancer removed from my face. A series of 12 needles “stung a little.” Not really, they hurt a lot. More than anything I had ever had done before.
I was measured for a brace in November so I could walk. It was going to take a few weeks. It’s been 6 already, and I have not yet heard anything about it. I had the flu the last week of 2007, and it was the perfect ending to a disastrous year. Ralphing into a bucket just seemed like an appropriate ending to my year. Sometimes I think I just keep going just to see what can happen to me next.
But hope springs eternal.
My motto is “Things will be great in 2008.”

I'm sure my parents dropped my on my head numerous times when I was a baby.

At least someone gets it

This politically correct, heaven forbid we offend someone BS is beyond my understanding. I have yet to meet anyone who was offended by a Holiday Greeting such as Merry Christmas or Happy Hannukah no matter what religion they were.
And I found this most interesting. All the TV stations and most programs have their little "Holiday Wishes" promos. Each is the most non denominational, plain vanilla greeting ever. "Season's Greetings, Happy Holidays, Feliz Navidad, 'Tis the Season." WTH is up with these greetings?

Season's Greetings and 'Tis the Season? WTF!!! I want to wish you a happy winter? That is possibly the most idiotic greeting ever. Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall--those are seasons. Christmas is no more a season that 4th of July or President's Day. Who would offer anyone a Happy Patriotic Season in July?

Happy Holidays falls right in with the generic and ubiquitous "Have a nice day." A pleasant enough greeting, but lacking in real commitment. It's better than "Merry Christmas if you celebrate it, " which I have heard. Oy vey!

And now, the prevalence of Feliz Navidad. So, apparently, if I were Spanish, I get an appropriate religious-based greeting. But for run of the mill Christians who speak English, no way, Jose.

Now, this is what I found most interesting in these greetings. They are on TV stations with predominantly Christian audiences. Overwhelmingly Christian would be a more accurate description. And here's the twist. I watch Asian-American TV on the weekends. I do love my Bollywood. : )
And on these channels, whose audience is, at best, only a tiny portion Christian, guess what their greeting was?

Merry Christmas.

A few weeks ago, they wished everyone a Happy Dawali, because that was what many (probably most) of the audience celebrates. They didn't qualify it or water it down so as to not offend Christians or Muslims, or whoever happens to watch their programming.
And this week, it was Merry Christmas. Because they realize anything else is just plain stupid. They didn't qualify it, they didn't dilute it, and they didn't mix in various other greetings.

We have a lot to learn from them about tolerance and acceptance. Inclusion and diversity does not mean suppression of what we love about our lives and heritage, but rather it is a way to celebrate alongside and revel in what each brings to our American tapestry.

Merry Christmas, Everyone.

Dear Santa Claus

It's been a while since I've written to you.

It's been a pretty f'd up year, so I figure you owe me big time. Normally, I ask about the wife and the elves, but this is all about me. I want stuff, and lots of it.
I want a race car set. Yeah, I know you got me one over 40 years ago. But that was given away many years ago. And I miss all the good times I had with it. There was something relaxing about sending the cars streaking around that circle. At that time, it seems hard to believe that an 8 year old needed to relax, but after a hard day of reading, writing, and all that crap, I had to get my mind off the pressures of school and watch the cars go around and around. I was pretty easy to entertain back then.

And you know what Big Guy? It hasn't changed much.

And if you could pack an electric football game in that bag, I'd be pretty happy. I know the guys never went where the should have, and I don't remember ever playing anything resembling the game of football because the thing was noisy and pretty much sucked. But I want one anyhow.

I used to like building model cars. For some reason, I always painted them baby blue with an overspray of gold. I'm sure they looked like crap, but to me they were beautiful. And I don't have any because me and Eddie from up the street used to blow them up in the field across the street. I promise not to blow them up. Besides, I don't know where Eddie lives any more.

I'd also like a couple model rockets. I used to have a fleet of them. I have no idea why, but I always painted them orange and black. I guess I thought that was a good combination. I'm not sure what color I'd paint them now. Maybe baby blue with gold overspray.

And I definately need soldiers. Don't try sticking me with those little stupid green army men, either. I want the 6" ones from Marx. And I want a few of each. Nothing sucked more than playing army and only having American soldiers and one German guy. And I'll need some Japanese soldiers, too. Make sure I get the guys throwing grenades. The Japanese one looked a little like Dice K and I want him to be the first to get shot by sniper fire when I play. I also would like some Roman soldiers. You can give the cowboys and Indians to some other guy seeking a second childhood.

This was usually the part of my letter where I asked you to bring me less presents because some poor kids needed them more. And I probably asked for peace.

Santa, we go way back. I don't really want to be greedy. Just get me the race car set. And have a nice Christmas.

I have created a monster

When I first got together with the Crotchety Old Lady we shared many passions. Sadly, Yankees baseball was not one of them. But over the last 15 very happy years, she has gradually been converted to fandom. I always imagined growing older with the woman I love and the team I have been a fan of for more years than I care to count. Sitting on the couch while enjoying each other and the best in sports entertainment--what a way to spend my days.

Gradually, the Old Lady has evolved and become a more knowledgeable fan. Again, this could only be considered a good thing. She has a favorite player (Andy Pettitte) and has Yankees gear. I should be the happiest man on the planet.

But much like Dr. Frankenstein, my plan has gone awry. I have created a fan in the purest sense of the word. Fan, as everyone should know, is short for fanatic. And that would be the way to describe my lady.

When A-Rod filed for free agency, her first reaction was that he betrayed her and the team.

And now that he has announced that he wants to come back (crawling back is how she described it) she has become really angry. She wants to take my A-Rod Jersey and cut it up and use it for dustrags after she washes the floor with it. Even though he is perhaps the best player of the last 10 years, and one of the greatest ever, he is terrible, according to her. A total bum because he did so badly in the playoffs. And she has pointed out at least a half dozen times that the Yankees lost the playoffs, and never made it to the Series totally because of him.

The Yankees are looking to re-sign Mo. And again, she is angry that he had what could only be considered an average year by every standard. She expects perfection each and every time out. She is ready to dump the greatest reliever in history because he had an average year.

I have created a monster, and she has turned on me.

Rockies in 4!!!

The World Series starts tonight, and I would be so pleased to see the Rockies win in 4. My reasoning is quite different than one might expect. Of course, I'm a dyed in the wool Yankees fan, and any time the Sox lose, I'm a happy guy. And few things would cheer up a Yankees fan more than a sweep by the other team. Any other team.
This year is unusual. The Rockies are riding a 10 game winning steak, and a 21 out of 22 run that has moved them from a wild card contender right into the World Series. Early in September, they were 5 games out, and had almost no chance. They were 2 games out with 2 to go. Yet today, they are in the Series. No baseball team in history has ever had a run like this.

If the Rockies lose the Series, they had a good season. If they win the Series, they had a great season. But if they sweep the Series, it may go down as one of the greatest seasons ever. Other sports have had great teams that have had great seasons. The Dolphins perfect 17-0 season in 1973 immediately comes to mind. And while no team has ever duplicated a perfect season, I contend that 25 out of 26 (with the season on the line every day) would be a greater accomplishment. Football is a team sport. It is rare that one person can step up and make a big difference. A great run is preceded by a terrific block. A circus catch required a throw good enough to be on target enough to be reachable. Anyone remember seeing Ypremian's attempt at a pass in the Super Bowl? Even a great kick requires a front line that can protect the kicker long enough to get the ball through the uprights.

Baseball, on the other hand, is loaded with unlikely heroes. It is part of the fabric of the game.
The most famous may have been Don Larson, with a career winning record of under .500. However, in 1956, this 11 game winner pitched the only perfect game in World Series history. Or Bucky Dent, a light hitting SS (40 home runs in 12 seasons) belted one of the most famed blasts in Yankees history. Or even Brian Doyle (Who?) hitting .438 in the '78 Series. No other sport can boast such outstanding performances by such otherwise obscure players.
At any time, one player can turn around a game. A pitcher can be unhittable. In no team sport can one man have such an impact. So anytime in this run, just one player could have stopped it. Yet, no one did. The longer the streak continues, the more improbable it has become. Just as many have approached DiMaggio's mark of 56 straight games with a hit, no one has ever equaled it. If the Rockies manage, against all odds, to sweep the Sox it would surely go down as the greatest run in sports history. And I'd like that.

But I am sad to admit that if I had to put money on a team, it would be on the Sox. In 6.

But hope springs eternal. Go Rockies!!!